The Malitz Muse

Out With the Old and In With the New

2012-01-03T13:26:00.000-06:00

Happy New Year! I certainly hope this year is better than 2011 was. I would like to forget most of that year and look forward to better things cause 2011 was not very kind to us. Jimmy was out of work for about nine months. We had to scrimp, beg and borrow just to make ends meet. That was not fun at all.

Now he has a new job making some good money with a plumbing company. But would you believe that on the 2nd of December just as we were about to catch up on things and look forward, he work van was stolen out of our parking lot! That was a blow because all his tools and equipment were stolen. That was several thousand dollars lost. Of course the insurance company will pay for some of it but we won't get the full value of things. Jimmy was heartbroken because some of the tools were his dad's and are no longer made. He was really upset too, because a tool set that I gave him for Christmas the first year we were married was part of the loss too. We are still waiting for word from the insurance company. Who knows how long that will take.

We lost two friends late in 2011. Jimmy's best friend died of throat cancer. It was sad to see a big man reduced to a shell of himself. Then we lost our dog Rowdy. He was only 11 years old. We took him to the vet but were told they would have to put him in the hospital for a couple of days but they could not say for sure if he would survive. And when we were told he would have to be by himself, we decided to take him home and let him die surrounded by family. Now he is with Lady in doggie Heaven.

On the bright side Jimmy's daughter surprised us with another puppy for Christmas. We really didn't want another dog so soon and certainly not a puppy. We thought we'd wait a while and get another dachshund about six months old. But Daisy looked so lonely. We could tell that she was lost without Rowdy. That is when Amanda surprised us with an 8 week old puppy named Ginger. She got her at a local animal shelter. Though she is not a dachshund like we wanted she is cute. But she is so tiny. I am always afraid I'll step on her. The papers the animal shelter gave us said she is a chihuahua. I guess I'll get used to her. I've never really wanted a dog of this breed, but I will not send her back. As long as she gets along with Daisy we'll keep her. She is already growing on us. We'll just have to wait for another dachshund later.

Hopefully this year will have more happiness and be better for us. I'm going to try to look forward to better times. As the baseball player Satchel Paige once said, "Never look back, something could be gaining on you". So, onward through the fog to a happy new year to us all. Right?

Doesn't He look Good?

2011-11-22T12:54:00.000-06:00

A good friend of my husband died recently. He fought the cancer battle for two years. My husband and he worked together for 12 years. Pete was in his early sixties, robust and healthy for most of those years. He was a large man with a loud voice. There was no way to lose him in a crowd. If he wasn't seen he was heard. I once accused him of bellowing orders. He laughed at me. But two years ago he learned he had cancer.

We are all going to lose the battle with death sometime. Most of us hope we can put it off for, well, forever. But we know that won't happen. Seeing Pete as he lay in his casket made me keenly aware of that. The big guy we were used to had shrunk to a shell of himself. People would stop by and look at him and think, "He looks good, doesn't he?". Really? You should have paid more attention to him. He does not look good. He looks dead. Why do people always say the person " looks good" or "they made him look good"? A human being who is no longer alive doesn't look good.

Seeing a friend lying in a casket makes me think of my future. I'm about the same age that Pete was. How many years will I have? That answer is not given to anyone. We all hope to live many healthy and productive years. We have things we want to do or places we would like to see. The one thing it reminds us is that life is really short. No matter the age at death, there was never enough time. One thing that really bothers me is that death brings so much sadness. Why? Sure we will miss that person. But life goes on. Are we sad at the loss or do we mourn our future?

Funerals bring family and friends together to honor and reflect on the life of the departed. We may also realize what we took for granted. Every funeral I have ever been to was tinged with sadness. When I go I don't want people to be sad. I want them to think, "Thank God the old bat is gone!" Well, maybe not. But I have always hated funerals and burials. I have always wanted someone to have a party and laugh, not cry. Remember the good times. Put the money someone would spend on a casket/funeral to use helping someone else. Yes I know that tradition and relgious upbringing dictate that we give the deceased this homage. But does it get us to Heaven any faster? Nobody has ever come back from the dead to give any information.

Even as a kid I thought a cemetary was a waste of space. Yes, I know what most people think. "I want a place where I can be close, or talk..." Then we move and never get back. Just what do we say to a plot of ground or a headstone? 'Hi, how are you doing? How's the weather?" There is less and less land available. The oceans are losing the reef structures. I thought I would like to be creamated and my ashes made into part of a reef. Or I thought I would like to have my ashes thrown into the ocean. Of course I am also a cheapskate. Cremation is cheaper. Then again, I'd rather not think that my family has to share custody of the urn. Knowing my family...nevermind.

I just would rather people remember me in the good times. I don't think I will look good dead. I can't see myself in a box that cost several thousand dollars. I'd rather know that a round of drinks for all in celebration of my life, not death. And please, don't anyone say "Doesn't she look good".

How Did This Happen? How Did We Miss It?

2011-11-11T12:02:00.000-06:00

The scandal at Penn State University is all over the news. It is without a doubt horrible. To think that a trussted employee of a major university would do something like this to children is, well there are no words for this. We read about this all the time. How many times do we see news stories all over the country about adults hurting children. What makes this even worse is that a major university is now going to have to figure out how this happened and why nobody did anything. How can this be fixed? Fire the man involved. Fire the Head Coach, Fire the school President.

Is this the answer? Many large companies have a "chain of command" that employees have to go to for problem solving. In this case when Joe Paterno was informed of what was happening, he apparently notified his superiors. But he did not call the police. Apparently no one did. Who was responsible for calling the police? Who knew what was going on and did nothing. Is this what a major university does or doesn't do? Was it right to fire Joe Paterno, the "face" of Penn State football? Did he know this was going on? How long did he know? Was it right to fire him because he did not call the police? Did he see this himself?

For years I have enjoyed college football. I've always been a fan of three major college coaches. I grew up watching Alabama's Paul "Bear" Bryant coach his teams and do things for the community. He frequently did things for families that the general public never knew. Coach Bryant coached for many years before integration. During this time he knew of good football players who were not white, and he often helped these players get into colleges where they could get an education and a future in the NFL, if that is what they wanted. He was the heart and soul of the Alabama Crimson Tide.

When I moved to Austin, Texas I watched the Texas Longhorns and Coach Darrell Royal. He, too was a football "God" in college football. He built a following no only with his players but the fans of football. Players knew he wanted the best for them both in college and after college. Many of his players went on to sucess in the NFL. In 1972 Texas played Penn State in the Cotton Bowl. That year I read a newspaper article about the two head coaches, Royal and Paterno. The writer wrote that either coach would be a good role model and teacher for any young man going to either school. Both coaches were highly regarded among their peers.

All three schools, Alabama, Texas, and Penn State are steeped in a long history and traditions. Fans live and die with the wins and losses on the football field. The Lions, Tide, and Horns are always fun to watch and hope they become National Champions. Both Bryant and Royal retired as beloved icons of their schools. But not Paterno.

Joe Paterno will not have this. He will not retire a winner. He once said he didn't want to retire because football was his life. There was nothing else for him to do. At his age maybe he was trying to life long enough to be Penn State Head Football Coach for 50 years. That will not happen. Now the university will have to figure out what to do. Their image and trust is gone. Many students rioted when they heard Paterno was fired. Will we ever hear JoePa's side of the story? To allow an assistant do what he did and say nothing is wrong. No question. How could Paterno not know? Why didn't he call the police? If he had to tell his superiors instead of calling police himself, why didn't they? Why? why? why? How many children will come forward and how can we help them?

I

To Death Us Do Part or Until You Change Your Mind?

2011-11-02T12:07:00.000-05:00

It seems that the entire world is talking about Kim Kardashien, again. She seems to constantly be fodder for someone. People are feeling duped, or upset that she is divorcing her husband of 72 days. One has to wonder how her husband,Kris feels about now. I saw a clip of him telling Kim that by the time they decided to have kids, no-one would care about them. In other words they would be old news, very old news. But that won't happen. Kim has decided to leave the marriage. By the way how many people really care? And just how much did they spend on that over the top wedding? Was it 10 million or 20 million? That's a lot of money to spend on a wedding even if it was to be a long lasting marriage. I can't help but think that a lot of charities would love to have that kind of money donated instead of thrown away. My thought, when I heard how much the wedding cost was "You could feed a small country for that kind of money".

My parents met during World War II. They knew each other six weeks. They had nearly 25 years and would have had more but my mother died of ovarian cancer when she was only 49. I'm sure they had their share of problems in their relationship. Most marriages go through both good and bad times. I tried to make my first marriage work for 17 years. But it was not a good relationship and ultimately ended in divorce. I tried to keep it together for my children. I did them no favors. I should have left sooner. But that was then.

These days "Hollywood" sees many stars "hook up" and have children with multiple partners and never get married. Over and over I see stories about someone having children before marriage, if they marry at all. That would be shamefull thirty years ago. Not now. But at least so far, Brad and Angela seem to be together forever. They have had or adopted a total of 6 kids. That takes work. Good for them. Others seem to marry and within a few months decide they don't want to be married. Hollywood is filled with a history of short marriages of stars.

Marriage is something that needs work. It seems that some, like Kim Kardashien, use the excuse that knew they should not have gotten married but did not know how to get out before they said "I do". In this case I don't know. Kim's mother, Kris Jenner and the rest of the family are defending her decision. But the viewing public seems to be outraged at her decision. They call her marriage a sham. Was it just for money? It has been said they did not make any money from showing the weddin on tv or in the magazines. Really? So what will happen with the show now? Will Kim keep the $2,000,000 ring? Should they return the gifts? Why is everyone asking? Does anyone want to know how the spurned husband feels? Inquiring minds want to know...oh wait I changed my mind, I don't want to know.

Is This Too Much for a Fan to do?

2011-10-22T14:54:00.000-05:00

Music is one thing I enjoy. I have a wide varity of artists whom I enjoy. I like many different styles. While I am not a big fan of Country Music there are artists I do like to listen to occasionally. I don't think George Strait has even done a bad song. I enjoy Reba, Toby Keith, Lady Antebellum and others.

I like to listen to jazz and enjoy both vocals and musicians. Ever heard of Jonny Blu or Charley Langer? How about Dave Koz, George Benson? They are just a few. Who could beat Ella Fitzgerald, Tony Bennett, or even Frank Sinatra? Or take Broadway music...many standards have come from Broadway. What would movie musicals do without Broadway? I even enjoy classical from time to time. It can be soothing and relaxing or a way to find the drama in music.

I have enjoyed seeing some singers/musicians in concerts. It can be a lot of fun. Of course these days it costs a lot for people to go to concerts. It could easily cost more than $100 to see a concert. I can only guess it is even more expensive to go see artists like Garth Brooks, Donny & Marie, Barry Manilow or others who establish a following at the different hotel venues in Las Vegas. It's not a cheap place to visit. Of course I've never been there so I really don't know.

Fans often write "reviews" of their favorite artist's performances. I know that many fans enjoy reading the personal stories of their friends visits. I have seen these reviews cover every thing from the costumes, to the song choices and styles as well as what the back-up singers/dancers do. Some fans see the same artist over and over again. They almost know the order in which the songs will be performed. If the artist changes a lyric or an inflection or even a facial expression, they note it.

I saw a "review" by a person who had seen the same artist in Vegas 200 times. Yes I said 200. Wow! I can not imagine that. What can you say about an artist when you have seen the show 200 times? What would the artist think about a fan that goes to Vegas to see him or her that many times? Really like the music, right? Loyal fan? Gotta have a lot of money, right? Or would the artist think the fan is obsessed? I don't begrudge any fan the right to see their favorite artist as many times as they want. But 200 seems a wee bit excessive. I'd rather, if I had that kind of money, spread it around and see a variety of people. I still haven't seen Straight No Chaser in Houston, or Dave Koz, or Michael Buble, or Big Bad VooDoo Daddy, or George Strait, and so on...

No, I do not envy people who do see the same people so many times. I would just rather have some variety. When you know what songs, moves, looks, jokes, costumes, dances, foot placement, etc will be done before the artist does them, you've seen them too much. But hey, I'm just a music fan who enjoys the songs the whole world sings.

You Want Me in "Who's Who"? Who Are You Kidding?

2011-10-12T13:49:00.000-05:00

The other day I got an interesting e-mail which said I had been selected for inclusion in a "Who's Who" list. Ok, I'll wait till you can stop laughing. I find this funny too. I've been snickering for a while now. So today I get another e-mail about this. Oh come on guys. I'm not an executive or professional... I have run offices and departments before, but nothing out of the ordinary. This is why I have to ask myself "What's the deal here? Or what is the catch to this? There is always a catch to these things.

Today's e-mail read: Dear Jillmalitz,

You were recently appointed as a biographicalcandidate for inclusion in the prestigious 2011 Search Who's Who" directory of accomplished executives and professionals.

We are pleased to inform you that on October 4th your candidacy was formally approved by Professional Biographies. Congratulations! The office of the Managing Director appoints individuals based upon a candidate's current position and also focuses on information obtained from researched executive and professional listings. Given your background, the Director thinks that you may make an interesting biographical subject for online publication.

There is NO COST nor obligation to be listed.

After receiving verification, we will validate your registry lissting within seven business days. Once finalized, your profile will share prominent registry space with thousands of fellow accomplished individuals across the globe - each representing accomplishments within their own geographical area.

Your prompt response is needed to ensure your correct professional information. Upon final conformation, you will also recieve a Free Personal Website (including your professionally written biography).

Our regisstration deadline is October 31st,2011. To ensure you are included, we must receive your verification on or before this date. On behalf of our Committee, I salute your achievement and look forward to welcoming you to our association.

Benjamin Morrison, Editor in Chief

First, there has to be a catch to this. Nobody gives an "honor" like this for nothing. And what's with the "free personal website"? Is there another Jill Malitz somewhere who is an accomplished professional person who deserves to be in a Who's Who". Next there has to be a cost somewhere, right? I'm pretty sure this is not legit. Pretty funny joke, right? Now let's all get back to regular programing.

The Post Office is on Life Support.

2011-10-10T15:11:00.000-05:00

The USPS, our wonderful post office, has been hemorraging money for quite some time now. Soon they will lay off thousands of employees and cut mail service. Does that bother anyone? What would Ben Franklin say? Write more letters? Well maybe we should write more. These days we want instant everything. We e-mail and text each other. We pay bills online. We shop online. So it is no wonder the mail service in in trouble.

Here is a novel idea. Write a letter. Yes, I said write. Pick up a pen or pencil and use your hand and fingers to actually write on paper. Paper manufacturers will love this. What do you mean you don't know how to write a letter? Oh dear. I remember when I was a kid having to write a Thank You note to my grandmother, aunt or uncle thank you notes for presents. We didn't have e-mail. I had to write these notes for Christmas gifts, birthday gifts, graduation or wedding gifts. Who does that now. I can actually remember the term "bread and butter" letters. Don't know those? If you went to spend time at another person's house you sent them a letter thanking them for having you at their home and how much you enjoyed the visit.

We used to spend a great deal of time picking out holiday cards or anniversary or birthday cards. We had to find just the right ones. Sweet cards to grandma. Funny cards to brother. Sympathy cards for the loss of a special person. This was hard work sometimes. I wonder how the cardmakers are doing. E-card are in fashion now. That is if we even do that. We have, for example gone from buying just the right present and card for a special occasion, to texting a greeting. Somehow that seems a little impersonal. Even taking time to call a person is too much for people to do. Then we wonder where time went because it is too late to talk to that person.

The Post Office these days seem to make the most money from junk mail and catalogs. Have you noticed the commercials for flat rate shipping? There is a reason for that. Money. But, the people who do actually get catalogs only look at them. Do they order by mail? No, they go online and order. Of course my last adventure online was ordering some free samples. I never got them. I hope the makeup shade looks good on the mail carrier.

Companies are encouraging people to pay bills online telling us that it is less waste of paper. Sure, let's save those trees and landfills. And just how long does it take for a disposable diaper to degrade in a landfill? I'm still not sure I want to pay my bills online. I still like getting that bill delivered once amonth. I had an experience years ago when a company took a payment out of my bank account twice in one month. That was not fun to get straight.

I guess we are just moving too fast these days. Soon the postal service will be a thing of the past. Until then, I will continue to get mail. Yes, I get irritated with some of the junk mail. Hey, it's mail. Can you imagine that little old lady down the street? That may be the only contact she has with the outside world. Her kids are in the cmputer age. They don't call, they don't write. If they can't say something in 140 characters or less, they don't do it. She will miss her mail person.

The Big Hype of Irene's Visit to New York City

2011-08-29T11:52:00.000-05:00

Irene visited New York City and decided that there was nothing for her to do there. So she moved on. That was a good idea on her part. But now people are complaining that the storm was "over-hyped" by officials and media. Was it over-hyped? I guess it depends on who you ask. Certainly New York City and other places along the eastern coastal areas could have had much more damage. Many people feel that they had no real reason to evaculate. Well...

Here in the Houston-Galveston area we have seen the good the bad and the ugly of Hurricanes. We've been told to evacuate. We've been stuck on vehicle clogged roads for hours. We have hunkered down and stayed home. Yeah, it is a pain to have to leave. But what is the alternative? We know all too well.

We remember Katrina, Rita, and Ike. We lived through them and learned. The state of Texas figured out how to get people out of harm's way in a timely manner. Yes, it wasn't easy. But we learned from our mistakes. We've seen the force a storm can bring. Allison was only a tropical storm. In and out, right? No, she decided to stay and flood much of Houston. The world famous medical center lost millions of dollars worth of valuable research. The Houston Symphony was babdly damaged. Even cell phones didn't work. But we learned what to change for our protection.

We watched, as did the world, as Katrina obliterated New Orleans. We watched as thousands of people there died. Bad planning? Some say yes. The federal government didn't act fast enough or had no idea what to do first. Now they know. We watched the Houston Mayor Bill White get in touch with "can do" people. The Astrodome was set up to take care of the hundreds of people escaping from New Orleans. Some skeptics said it couldn't be done. Houston did it. We learned what to do and how to do it.

I remember being one of the "lucky" ones during Ike. We lost electicity, but we still had water. Because our water heater was gas we could still take showers. We learned how to cope with no power for nine days. We watched as electric company trucks from across the country rolled into town after the hurricane. We watched as people worked together to get this area back up and running. Sure there were problems and some people and places have yet to be fixed for a lot of reasons. But we are still learning.

Yeah, maybe the Hurricane Irene was not as bad as was predicted. Those mayors and governors may have been over cautious, thus over-hyping the scope of the disaster. But tell that to those who lost loved ones. Tell that to the people who have flooded homes or destroyed homes. I know that your vacations may have been ruined and you have had to scramble to get where you need to go. You are losing patience because it may be days before you can get a flight out of town. You have problems with hotels. Your vacation is ruined and your patience is waning. You didn't get to see that Broadway play that you waited months to get tickets. New Yorkers got off easy. Trust me. You are thinking that this was all a bunch of pontificating for nothing. Maybe...until the next time. Then you will be glad you were told to evacuate.

Irony in Heaven

2011-08-28T09:51:00.000-05:00

Two men are waiting at the gates of Heaven and speak to each other.

"How'd you die?" the first man asked.

"I froze to death," the second man said.

"That's awful," says the first man. "How does it feel to freeze to death?"

"It's very uncomfortable at first," says the second man. "You get the shakes and then you get pains in all your fingers and toes. But, eventually, it's a very calm way to go. You get numb and drift off as if you were sleeping. How about you? How'd you die?"

"I had a heart attack," said the first man. "I knew my wife was having an affair,so one day I showed up at home unexpectedly and found her alone watching TV. I ran around the house looking for her lover didn't find him. As I ran up the stairs to the attic, I had a massive heart attack and died."

The second man shakes his head. "That's so ironic."

"What do you mean?" asked the first man.

"If you had only stopped to look in the freezer, we'd both still be alive."

Selling Insurance to Whom?

2011-08-20T11:05:00.000-05:00

Sometime I wonder if insurance people have ever noticed this. I saw an ad on televison for a "Senior" care life insurance. What's so special about that? Nothing really, except for one samll thing. The ad showed the age range from "0 to 85"... The voice-over person said "if you are between zero and eight-five call this number...you can't be turned down.... While I know that "Seniors" may times need more life insurance this caught my attention for only one reason. How is a person age "0" going to hold a phone, yet alone dial it? How is a 0 aged person going to speak? How is the operator going to hear them or be able to understand words. Who will the bill for the insurance go to? Do they even know their mailing address? How much life insurance will they need to buy. After all they can't be turned down for insurance, right? Heaven help the 0 aged person trying to muddle through the telephone system of some companies. If you want English press 1, if you want to speak to an operation press 2, to hear this message again, hang up and do something else.

Yeah, I want to see this. Don't you? Then again I want to see how long my dogs would actually wear a snuggie blanket.

Just What I Need, A Light Bulb

2011-08-03T10:38:00.000-05:00

As I played around on Facebook the other day I saw an ad which made me think "what"? We all know that energy efficiency and savings are hot topics these days but this really made my day. The ad was showing a light bulb from GE that is supposed to last 200 years. Yes, I said 200 years. Personally I think it was a joke. We all know that the average energy efficient lightbulb is supposed to last longer than the old-fashioned incandescent bulbs that we all know. Some have said ten years. Good. But 200 years? Come on now. Why should I care if a light bulb will last 200 years? I'm not going to live that long, right? Sure we can live longer, healthier lives thanks to modern medicine and good genes, but not 200 years. So why should I buy a light bulb that will outlive me? That just sounds a little creepy to me.

I can just see this now. The newest rage in baby shower gifts. The gift that keeps on giving. Give that brand new baby a light bulb for the nursery and later their bedroom, their college dorm room and even into their brand new home when they grow up. Sure it would be easy to store and pack every time a person moves and I guess it would save money (and energy, remember). Then we move on to the eldercare home. Yes Grandma, you can bring your light bulb. Yes I know it will help with your failing eyesight. By the way, have you updated your will?

Any light bulb that is said to last 200 years should be passed from generation to generation, right. Imagine the fight at the reading of the will. Bobby gets the golf clubs, Susie gets the jewelery, Don gets the house, Jane gets the light bulb. Now everyone is mad at her. Jane is happy (I assume) to get this, but it still has a lot of years left. What is she going to do with it since it will outlast her. Somehow I just don't see any joy in this. Who wants to keep a light bulb for 200 years.

At my age if someone gave me a lightbulb for a Mother's Day, birthday or Christmas present I would wonder what the real motive of giving this as a gift was. Are my children trying to tell me something? Do they really think I would like this. Did they spend a lot of time trying to decide on "just the right gift"? Do they want to make sure it stays in the "family" like family heirloom? Will there be fights over it? Will it increase in value? Someone will have to figure it out. I won't be around. Neither will my children, grandchildren, etc. Get the picture? Or maybe we need to turn on the light?

In the Still of the Night

2011-06-17T23:12:00.003-05:00

The boys and their dad left late this afternoon to go to El Paso to visit family. They also took the two cats to Jason's sister. It's 11:15 at night and it sure is quiet around here, just Annie and me. I never really noticed the cats making any real noise before. I've gotten used to to the way they slink around the house. Just imagine two black and white cats who think they are in charge. Chloe, the female tries to stay out of the way for the most part. Willie, the "fat cat, does not. Time and time again I watched as he lumbered down the hall to the bedroom. Ever go into a bedroom only to find that a cat has laid claim to it? How many times has that cat climbed onto the dresser so that he could survey the landscape? I don't know how many times I have had to remove him from his perch on top of something or step over him as he lay on his back in the middle of the floor.

I never really thought about how much noise two boys make, even when they are playing quietly. Their latest kick is to run through the house shooting each other with nerf guns. A nine year old, and six year old can come up with some weird sound effects. Now that they are not here it is too quiet.Annie and I are each sitting here, in separate chairs, watching tv and "playing" on the computer. I even tweeted her from across the room. Sad isn't it. Remember I said it is very quiet here. The last real noise we heard was the two boys and two cats getting into the car. Chloe was loudly protesting the fact that she was stuck in the cat carrier while Willie was "free" to roam about the inside of the car. With two little boys for companions one can only guess how that trip will end. One boy wondered what the cats would do on the trip while the other boy complained that he couldn't watch a movie because the Neon didn't have a way to play movies like Mom's Tahoe does. Let me see...one father, two boys, and two cats in one small car for five to six hours. I'm so glad I didn't go on that trip.

Annie decided to let Bailey, the big black lab come inside. So it's a real girls night in for us. The dog came into the room, ambled over to me as if to ask, "What's the plan?" Plan? what plan? We are just breathing in all the quiet, peaceful air. Scarey isn't it? Wonder what we will do tomorrow? Bailey can't seem to figure out where the cats are. But, once or twice around the room and she decided any further investigation was not needed. So begins the long, quiet and dark night. Think I need to go to bed. Maybe I'll sleep a little late tomorrow, say maybe to seven? Try not to wake me too early.

Apps, Internet Dummy Down the World?

2011-06-03T15:29:00.006-05:00

We've all heard the saying, "there's an app for that". I have no idea how many applications are available. Some are free and others cost money. Some are useful and others are...well not so much. You can get directions,play games, or be funny by using sayings. We have come to depend on them for so many things. Let your baby cry and an app can tell you why the baby is crying.. Some people use funny sayings apps. I guess they are funny, but from what I have seen some of the "funny sayings" are not especially funny unless your are a 10 year old boy who likes "bathroom" humor. "Angry Birds" is a popular game. I've never played it. I have enough trouble with solitaire. All of this brings up, at least for me. Are all these applications, and the internet itself, seem to make our lives easier but does it really?

Newspapers have seen circulation dry up because most newspapers can be read on line. Every time I see a paper copy of the Houston Chronicle newspaper I cringe. It used to be a large thick paper. Not any more. Is it lack of advertizing or lack of subscribers? No one seems to read a newspaper or magizine these days unless it is on the internet. Sometimes the enternet articles are full length but often they are not. Many newspapers may no longer be in business before long. Is that good? We are a world of instant everything thanks to the internet. Breaking news from anywhere in the world is instantly sent out. Major news networks all have their own websites. We watched the funeral of Michael Jackson and the wedding of Prince William.

We can buy almost anything online. We buy clothes, computers, music and books online. We find jobs there too. We can sell things too. Of course then it really becomes "buyer beware" because not everything sold is "real". We can check on our kids when they get home from school and we can pay bills. Some of this brings possible questions of security. We've all seen stories of banks and companies being hacked. Do you think you are really safe on the net? tAnd of course the net is full of "true stories" which when researched are not true. Example, how many more times will President Obama have to show his birth certificate before some people will believe he is a citizen of the United States.

In the long run, I wonder all the applications and the internet are not lulling us into a false sense of security. We don't call people on the phone. We text. We don't stop at a gas station to ask directions. We Google them. Some of us don't exercise like we used to by going to a store and walking around while shopping. We shop online. And then we sit and wait for our order to come to us. What would happen if we all lost use of the phone applications and the internet for even one day? We've all seen what happens when Twitter goes down even for a couple of days. How many people would be distraught to find that they could not get on the net? When was the last time you used the Yellow Pages books? They still make them - for now. But soon they will be phased out. We check on our bank balances buy calling our phone or checking the account online. Soon the Social Security Administration will no longer send out paper checks. That is supposed to be more secure. Less chance of the paper checks getting into the wrong hands.

Think back to the days when there was no internet. Remember. Computers were the size of an average room. We didn't have home computers. Do you remember. You often had to walk somewhere to buy something. You had to go to a library or school to learn something. You had to physically do things, not just push a button on your phone or keyboard. Most people these days would be lost without all those applications. Just look at how far technoligy has come. What if you didn't have it? What would you do? You won't be able to find an app for that. Think about all we do easily by app or computer. Poof! It's all gone! Now what?

If Noah Built an Ark in 2011

2011-04-20T08:57:00.001-05:00

And lo, in the year 2011, the Lord came unto Noah, who was now living in the United States, and said:
"Once again, the earth has become wicked and over-populated, and I see the end of all flesh before me."

"Build another Ark and save two of every living thing along with a few good humans."

He gave Noah the blueprints, saying, "You have 6 months to build the ark before I will start the unending rain for 40 days and 40 nights."

Six months later, the Lord looked down and saw Noah weeping in his yard, but there was no ark.

"Noah! I'm about to start the rain! Where is the ark?"

"Forgive me, Lord," begged Noah, "but things have changed."

"I needed a building permit."

"I've been arguing with the inspector about the need for a sprinkler system."

"My neighbors claim that I've violated the neighborhood zoning laws by building the ark in my yard and exceeding the height limitations. We had to go to the Development Appeal Board for a decision."

"Then the Department of Transportation demanded a bond be posted for the future costs of moving power lines and other overhead obstructions, to clear the passage for the ark's move to the sea. I told them that the sea would be coming to us, but they would hear nothing of it."

"Getting the wood was another problem. There's a ban on cutting local trees in order to save the spotted owl."

"I tried to convince the environmentalists that I needed the wood to save the owls, but no go!"

"When I started gathering the animals, an animal rights group sued me. They insisted that I was confining wild animals against their will. They argued the accommodations were too restrictive, and it was cruel and inhumane to put so many animals in a confined space."

"Then the EPA ruled that I couldn't build the ark until they'd conducted an environmental impact study on your proposed flood."

"I'm still trying to resolve a complaint with the Human Rights Commission on how many minorities I'm supposed to hire for my building crew."

"Immigration and Naturalization are checking the green-card status of most of the people who want to work."

"The trades unions say I can't use my sons. They insist I have to hire only Union workers with ark-building experience.

"To make matters worse, the IRS seized all my assets, claiming I'm trying to leave the country illegally with endangered species."

"So, forgive me, Lord, but it would take at least 10 years for me to finish this Ark."

Suddenly, the skies cleared, the sun began to shine, and a rainbow stretched across the sky.

Noah looked up in wonder and asked, "You mean you're not going to destroy the world?"

"No," said the Lord. "The government beat me to it."

That's Some Bad Horror Movie

2011-04-07T13:47:00.004-05:00

Last night while taking Daisy out I discovered a crawfish was waving at me, or maybe Daisy. I'm not sure. It was waving it's pinschers wildly in the air as we walked by. Ever try to keep a curious dachshund from getting smacked by a crawfish? I didn't like the idea of a battle between the two species, so I pulled Daisy away and took her back inside. I told Jimmy what I had found. When he came out, he suggested we grab it and put it in the fish tank. "You grab it!" I thought. Not me. I stood there watching it attacking the air by striking a "come near me and I'll hurt you" pose with it's claws ready to strike. I think I'll just go back inside. Where did that thing come from anyway?

Of course the minute I went back inside Rowdy wanted to go outside to do his business. Thinking I would avoid the armed intruder, Rowdy and I went in a different direction than Daisy and I had. So much for that idea. We found another one lurking around the front of the building. Rowdy is a lot smaller so I had to distract him and go around in back of the building. It was then that I saw a third pincher packing bad guy. Feeling like I had stepped onto the set of a bad horror movie, I began to wonder how the trio had managed to wander into this area. This is the time of year when people eat a lot of the little critters. No wonder these guys didn't seem to thrilled about their location. They did look a little like they were ready to take hostages for safe passage to a friendly river.

Though I thought briefly that one of them might make an interesting addition to our fish tank, I was not about to make the offer to any of them. I like my fingers the way they are. After the dogs had finished their nightly stroll, I got ready to go back to the comfy confines of the indoors. It was then that I discovered one of them had decided to try to block the way by establishing residency, however temporary in front of the door. Menacingly it looked at me as if it were ready to attack my foot. Ok, can we cut to the stunt double now? I really don't want to deal with this. Who's directing this horror flick anyway? Where's Wes Craven when you need him.

The dogs and I were able to sidestep the creature without further bother. But that one little guy apparently had decided to stay there in front of the door for a while. Early this morning before sunrise, I gingerly took the dogs out. I had trouble seeing if the crawfish were still outside since it was dark. After sunrise I decided to see if they were there. Two of them had apparently escaped. But one was lying dead between the buildings in front of the lamp post. Sorry dude. Later I heard my neighbor lift what sounded like the top of a cast iron pot lid on his patio. Ah ha! Could the three escapees have been meant for boiling? It sounded like it. I know that my neighbor likes to eat crawfish. For that matter so does Jimmy. Me? No thanks! Beheaded shrimp, yes. Pulling the head of a crawfish off and eating the crawfish may be what a lot of people around here like. I'll skip it. It sounds too much like a sequel to the "Attack of the Mad Crawfish" movie. What? You haven't seen it? Oh well, it was a very low budget film. It was only showed one night. Last night.

If God had Voicemail

2011-03-10T11:07:00.002-06:00

I saw this on the Beliefnet site and couldn't resist.

Thank you for calling heaven.

I am sorry, all of our angels and saints are busy helping other sinners right now. However, your prayer is important to us and we will answer it in the order it was received. Please stay on the line.

If you would like to speak to:
God, press 1.
Jesus, press 2.
The Holy Spirit, press 3.
If you would like to hear King David sing a Psalm while you are holding, press 4.

To find a loved one who has been assigned to Heaven, press 5, then enter his or her social security number followed by the pound sign. (If you get a negative response, please hang up and try area code 666.)For reservations in heaven, please enter J-O-H-N 3:16

For answers to nagging questions about dinosaurs, the age of the earth, life on other planets, and where Noah's Ark is, please wait until you arrive.

If you are calling after hours and need emergency assistance, please contact your local pastor.

Read more: http://www.beliefnet.com/Entertainment/Joke-of-the-Day/Daily-Joke.aspx#ixzz1GDXYjeJX

Hey Prisoner, Your Ass is Ringing

2011-03-08T14:45:00.003-06:00

Texas is one of many states finding it hard to keep cell phones out of prisoners hands. They are easy to hide and apparently are even easier to get through prison walls. They are so valuable that convicts are willing to pay large sums of money, sometimes more than for illegal drugs, to get them. According to the Inspector General of the Texas Department of Criminal Justice, one phone could cost as much as $2000. How do convicts get that kind of money? And just how do these cell phones get inside? It is apparently not unusual for family/friends or even prison trustees seem to know how to smuggle them in. There could even be some crooked prison guards in the mix. One state senator received a call from a death row prisoner. Needless to say that senator was not at all happy. Apparently there is not much in the way of prisoner monitoring. So now the Texas Legislature passed a bill that would crack down on the prisoners with cell phones. That bill went straight to Gov. Rick Perry.

So this bill would allow prisons to detect or block cell phone signals. Arizona prison officials are apparently training dogs to sniff out cell phones. Ok, so how are they doing that? Do they send dogs into each cell to sniff the beds and other things in the prison? There has even been talk in Texas about doing cavity searches to find the phones. Boy, wouldn't you like that job. I can see the guard now, "Drop your pants and spread your cheeks, I'm going in..." Or what about the women's prison? Most women have a yearly GYN exam. Lie down, we are going to do an internal exam. Speculum? Look what we found! I don't think we will need to send this to pathology - it's only a cell phone. Either way prisoners beware. A dog may sniff out a phone. Or since prisoners will always find new and inventive ways to hide things, prison officials could just wait until they hear a cell phone ring from a body cavity. Who wants to dive in and find it?

The Joke's on Us, Again

2011-02-04T12:01:00.003-06:00

The day is here. The day children hoped they would see snow. Gotcha! Didn't happen! Call me a cynic, but I knew it wouldn't. I really did hope I would get to see what my dogs would do in a couple of inches of snow. But Mother Nature was just kidding. All week we listened to warnings of impending significant amounts of snow. Snow was the lead topic of all the local new outlets. Plans were made for the roads and schools and even some business owners. Schools dismissed early Thursday as the weather pattern trudged along looking more and more like we would be in the middle of a blizzard. How big a snowman will we be able to make?

Yesterday all the weather experts were in line saying things would start getting bad around noon. There would be significant accumulations of snow and so on. Then when noon came and nothing really changed, I began to see a hedging of bets. It will come later they said. We still expect a good bit of snow. As the evening goes they said. Then around midnight it would come. That's when I began to think that maybe... no I will still see snow. It would just be later they said, after midnight. We would have to adjust to thinking about snowfall after midnight and waking up to snow in the morning. Ok, I can live with that.

So I wake up Friday morning - no snow, just ice. I knew it would not happen. The weather people dangled that carrot in front of us again and we fell for it. Again. Without snow there was nothing to do. No snowmen to make, no snowballs to throw. Ah, but there was ICE. Ice on the grass, the trees, cars, roads. All of the schools were already closed having dismissed early Thursday afternoon. Ice all over bridges and highway over-passes forced closures of some highways and roads. Authorities begged people not to try to drive in the icy conditions. Did drivers listen? No. Hundreds of accidents happened. A large truck got stuck on a high bridge and could not safely move. So for hours it sat waiting. In another accident, rescuers could not get to the victims by ambulance so they gingerly walked their equipment to them for treatment. It was not the "fun" morning we had hoped for by any means.

Local news was all about ice. Reporters were everywhere covering the story. I don't know how many different reporters were sent to report on the stranded truck story. One reporter had an accident on route to her story which was IN a building. But the story continued to get coverage, if for no other reason than to discourage drivers from attempting to drive. If you don't have to go out, don't go out was the mantra. The news droned on and on, taking over just about all morning programing. I, bored with the repetition, quit watching the news.

Now, it is afternoon and the sun is out. Temperatures are still low and there may still be some ice, but soon it will all be gone. That is until the next time Mother Nature decides to tease us. I said I would believe it when I saw it. I still haven't seen it so I still don't believe. The joke is on us, again. We now return you to regular programing.

Houston, I'll Believe It When I See It.

2011-02-01T09:16:00.003-06:00

The big news topic these days is the weather. Snow and ice are all over the country. I understand that thirty-seven states have some form of snow or ice. Even Hawaii had snow, but Alaska didn't. Many of my friends live in areas where the snow has piled up and it is difficult to get around. They are all tired of the freezing temperatures and the mountains of snow. Havoc abounds. We here raid the stores when we are waiting for a hurricane. In some parts of the country people are raiding stores for food during free time between shoveling snow.

This is one reason why I live in the South. Most of the places in the South where I have lived rarely got snow. If it snowed it wasn't much and didn't last long. As a child I remember one time snow fell where we lived in the small town of Brewton, Alabama. I was in grammar school when it snowed. My dog didn't like it. It snowed when I was in high school in North Augusta, South Carolina. It made for a nice picture. I moved, years ago, to Austin, Texas. It rarely snows in Austin, my uncle told me. That year it snowed three times.

In Houston where I now live, it rarely snows. Occasionally snow flurries will float around for a day or so. This is when everybody goes nuts. Nobody knows what to do. So far all the weather people are reporting that we have anywhere from a 20- 60% chance of snow starting maybe Thursday night or sometime Friday. Trucks have already been out spraying some bridges and roadways while others are on standby in the event of a lot of ice. Ice is more likely here, but who knows? People in Houston really get excited when snow is mentioned, but they also get nervous. I can just hear the children now, praying for snow. On the other hand people here don't know what to do. They all run outside to take pictures and send them to the local tv stations or put on their Facebook pages.

I know that there are a lot of kids hoping for a "snow day" school closure. At this very moment the DFW airport in Dallas is closed. That brings an interesting problem for people arriving for the Super Bowl football game. The teams have both already arrived but a lot of fans have not. I wonder what they will do if the Dallas area still has a lot of snow on Sunday? Will the airport be able to open soon? I think it is funny that the game will be played in what is supposed to be a fairly "warm" area. We didn't have these problems when Houston hosted the Super Bowl. Janet Jackson had a problem, but we didn't.

I guess I will just wait and see what happens here. Part of me is excited about the possibility of snow, especially if it were to be of a significant amount. We don't usually get much in the way of snow here. I've gone outside to watch a few flakes fly furiously for a fleeting time. I know that is some parts of our area there has been enough snow to make tiny snowmen. But, we shall see as time goes on and the day gets near. Weather people have been wrong before, but they are all saying we will have some snow. Of course the media can't make up their minds. Our chances of snow are anywhere from 20 to 60% depending on who is reporting at the moment. I will believe it when I see snow on the ground.

Let's Talk...

2011-01-22T15:34:00.003-06:00

Is it just me or have people stopped having conversations? Of course we all know people who won't shut up, especially when talking politics or religion. But do family or friends talk to each other anymore? Sure we have to talk to the boss at work or co-workers. But even there e-mail or text seems to be the preferred method of communication.

I watched two of my daughters sit on the same couch and text each other. Hello, you are sitting beside each other! Open your mouth. Some people do call on the phone to ask a question when one person is upstairs and the other downstairs in the same house. Some people will text and then follow with a picture all from their cell phone.

Since we can't text or use a cellphone while driving, who will talk? Just let the machines do it. Smart phones are getting smarter. Soon we will be able to use credit/debit cards from our cellphones. We can watch a movie on our cell phone. That way we don't have to leave the house and ask someone for a ticket or popcorn and a drink. We can get directions on a GPS system. I'm sure the men of the world will like that. They won't have to drive around and around town looking for something while the wife complains, "ask somebody" Let the "box" do it.

The very act of actually talking to a human being may become a lost art. Of course there will always be people in bars. They love to talk, and talk, and talk. The more the drink the more they talk, or attempt to. Have you seen the commercial featuring a girl breaking up with her boyfriend by text while she sits across from him at the same table? Some cars can tell what they are doing or how they are feeling by e-mailing you a status report. "My oil is a quart low and the left rear tire needs air."

We used to send birthday cards to people. That required going to a story and picking out that special card for that special person. Then we would actually speak the words "Happy Birthday". If our favorite grandparent,aunt/uncle, brother/sister needed to talk, we listened, sometimes in person, occasionally on the phone. Now it's a text in some weird abbreviated script which sometimes is hard to understand if you are not up on the texting lingo. The image of "phone sex" has forever changed. $20 per character, emoticons are extra.

Oh well. I'll stop now. I've got to talk to someone. Do dogs count as someone?

Religious Debate?

2011-01-11T10:38:00.000-06:00

About a century or two ago, the Pope challenged the Jewish community of Rome to a debate.

The Jews looked around for a champion who could defend their faith, but no one wanted to volunteer. It was too risky. So they finally picked an old man named Moishe who spent his life sweeping up after people to represent them. Being old and poor, he had less to lose, so he agreed. He asked only for one addition to the rules of debate. Not being used to saying very much, he asked that neither side be allowed to talk. The Pope agreed.The day of the great debate came. Moishe and the Pope sat opposite each other for a full minute before the Pope raised his hand and showed three fingers. Moishe looked back at him and raised one finger. The Pope waved his fingers in a circle around his head. Moishe pointed to the ground where he sat. The Pope pulled out a wafer and a glass of wine. Moishe pulled out an apple. The Pope stood up and said, "I give up. This man is too good. The Jews win."

An hour later, the cardinals were all around the Pope asking him what happened. The Pope said, "First I held up three fingers to represent the Trinity. He responded by holding up one finger, to remind me that there was still one God common to both our religions. Then I waved my finger around me to show him, that God was all around us. He responded by pointing to the ground, showing that God was also right here with us. I pulled out the wine and the wafer to show that God absolves us from our sins. He pulled out an apple to remind me of original sin. He had an answer for everything. What could I do?"

Meanwhile, the Jewish community had crowded around Moishe, amazed that this old, almost feeble-minded man had done what all their scholars had insisted was impossible. "What happened?" they asked.

"Well," said Moishe, "first he said to me that the Jews had three days to get out of here. I told him that not one of us was leaving. Then he told me that this whole city would be cleared of Jews. I let him know that we were staying right here."

"And then?" asked a woman.

"I don't know," said Moishe. "He took out his lunch and I took out mine."

Christmas is When?

2010-12-15T11:45:00.002-06:00

I just realized that Christmas is right here, just about to beat down the door. Why do I feel that it is coming earlier this year? Maybe because I am getting older? This whole year has gone by so fast I wonder why I don't have whip-lash. Yesterday was July 4th right?. No? You mean I missed Labor Day, Thanksgiving and now Christmas is coming? I guess it's a good thing I put up that little tree. Maybe by next year it will have grown. Years ago, we used to set up our decorations and Christmas tree at Thanksgiving. We used to have the whole family come for dinner. Now I couldn't fit everyone in this tiny little space. I know that it's just around the corner. After all I have already watched "It's a Wonderful Life" and "A Christmas Carol" on TCM. I've seen several Christmas movies on ABC Family Channel. All the early shows like Good Morning America, The Early Show and the Today show have been decorated for Christmas. Even the Sports channels like ESPN have decorations. Where was I? Many of my neighbors have their homes lit up with lights and lawn decorations are everywhere. I did put out a few decorations. here is a snowman on the desk here. Small candles in the shapes of sleighs, trees, and Santa. Even my downstairs bathroom has Christmas towels in it. But that was all last minute thoughts.

We got our annual Christmas card from our insurance company and Aunt Pat. Aunt Pat always sends us her "Year in Review" letter along with the card. I gave up sending cards years ago. The rest of our family seems to have given up that tradition too. Of course there are times when we are lucky to remember who we all are. These are the days when everyone seems to do their own thing. Not only that but most of the family is scattered around Texas which makes visiting each other a monumental event. Flying is something I used to enjoy, but that is well...you know. Have you heard "Grandma Got Molested at the Airport"? There is a lesson in there somewhere, I think.

Actually I am really glad that I don't have to fight to buy and hide toys anymore. But I still remember the days when you would set foot into a house and be taken back to a different time. The home always smelled like the season. If cookies weren't in the oven, they were cooling on the racks. Candles burned brightly with festive sents. Sometimes just a hint of the smell of a warm apple pie candle or a bayberry or pine scented candle would be enough to send anyone back to a simpler, slower time.

But now the simpler, slower time seems to go faster and faster. So fast, sometimes I think I missed it all. Maybe it's just me. I remember going to buy a live tree with my parents. Today when I do see a live tree, I can't help but think that it's not the same. We do thinks so fast today. When family comes to visit do they talk to each other? No, They sit on the couch, each with a laptop or phone texting each other. What ever happened to talking?

Yes I did suddenly realize how close we are to Christmas. Some people would like to flash forward and be done with it. Not me. I wish I could turn back the hands of time and do more, even if it is just putting a quarter in that red kettle. At least I don't have to battle the scotch tape or try to figure out how to wrap an odd shaped present. Where's the figgy pudding? So before I loose track of time again, I would like to say Happy Holidays to everyone!

All She Needs is a Miracle

2010-12-08T11:35:00.001-06:00

A woman was walking along the beach when she stumbled upon a genie's lamp. She picked it up and rubbed it. Lo-and-behold a genie appeared. The amazed woman asked if she got three wishes.

The Genie said, "Nope. Due to inflation, constant downsizing, low wages in third-world countries and fierce global competition, I can only grant you one wish. So, what'll it be?"

The woman didn't hesitate. She said, "I want peace in the Middle East. See this map? I want these countries to stop fighting with each other."

The Genie looked at the map and exclaimed, "Gadzooks, lady! These countries have been at war for thousands of years. I'm good, but not THAT good! I don't think it can be done. Make another wish."

The woman thought for a minute. She said, "Well, I've been trying to find the right husband. You know, one that's considerate and fun, likes to cook and helps with the housecleaning, has a great sense of humor and gets along with my family, doesn't watch sports all the time and is faithful. That's what I wish for. A good mate."

The Genie let out a long sigh and said, "Let me see that map again."

Poor Little Tree

2010-11-29T11:13:00.002-06:00

After a few years of no Christmas decorations we decided to put up a tree this year. Alas, we are without room for a big tree anymore. Our big tree sits in it's box lonely and depressed. It's used to being the star of the show around this time of year. Can a Christmas tree be a diva? I don't have the nerve to ask it. It might just throw branches at me. Dozens and dozens of ornaments of various shapes and sizes used to adorn it. "I look great! I am the center of everything!" After all those years the ornaments sat in the boxes waiting hopefully to be released to adorn the branches of the room commanding tree. Sorry, not this year.

It just doesn't feel right without a tree in the place. One year I tried to decorate with poinsettias. They looked nice but something just wasn't right. There was a point when nearly every room had some decorations in them. But time and downsizing have taken a toll on the Christmas season of decor. Then we were out shopping one day. Our eyes met. Poor little tree... We decided to see if we could find a smaller tree which we could put on top of a chest in the living room. It would have to be inexpensive since this year has been less than what we'd hoped. We wandered over to Big Lots and there it was. A four four tall pre-lit tree. It beckoned to us, "take me home with you."

After so many years of big trees, the little tree looked so puny as it sat on the chest. It reminded me of Charlie Brown's little tree. I went upstairs and brought down a few of our many ornaments. Not boxes and boxes as in the past, but a few special, memorable ornaments. The little tree seemed to smile as I put some bows and birds and other ornaments on it. "Thank you," it seemed to say. "I know I'm not your favorite, but I will make you happy. Wait and see." As I put the decorations on it, somehow it seemed a little brighter, a little happier. No longer a poor little tree, it seemed to know that it was wearing decorations chosen with love. The poor little tree was no longer...now it is a member of the family. It even looks like it is smiling. "Ho,ho,ho. Merry Christmas!"

To Spank or Not to Spank...

2010-11-08T14:06:00.002-06:00

I am so glad that my children were as good as they were. Sure they were not always good and the occasionally were spanked for various reasons. Most of the time it was because they would not listen and left me no choice. Yeah, I did the time out routine when they were little. I also spanked when that did not work. But right from the start I had rules for them.

I feel that in some cases spanking is not only a useful too but sometimes there is no other option. I do understand that some people don't want their child spanked. So what do you do when time out or taking away something doesn't work? Some small children do not seem to respond to time outs. This is fine for parents who have kids who listen. What happens if they don't listen and continue to misbehave even after a time out?

My children had a certain bedtime and a certain routine every day. They knew what to expect. However some children don't seem to have any ground rules. They stay up late and talk back to parents or caregivers. They don't listen to what the adults say. They are too young to understand that somethings are not safe for them to do, so the adult has to watch them closely to keep them out of harm's way. When told what to do they don't always listen. This is not good for their future education and relationships.

While I respect a parent's right to choose a non-spanking form of punishment, that does not always work. It is fine for some who have docile children or only one child. But occasionally there is a child who refuses to pay attention to anyone. Since I've been babysitting a couple of children I have run across many hurdles in childhood. I'm looking after a couple of kids all day and one after school. All of them know the rules. Occasionally they break the rules and sometimes a little spanking helps. I rarely have many serious problems. Just the "threat" of a spanking usually does the trick.

But recently there is another child in the mix. She is the same age as the two all day kids. So that makes two who are four, one three and the eldest is six and in school during the day. The newest four year old will be leaving my care soon because her mother did not like the fact that I had to spank her daughter one day. I can understand that. But personally I don't think the child is getting proper supervision at home which is creating a problem for me. I think a four year old should have a set bedtime, say eight o'clock in the evening. She has no such rule. She is often up at midnight. Then she has to be up early to go to the baby sitter (me). Since mom won't allow spanking, this little girl does what she wants when she want to do it. She often talks the other children into trouble. Then she lies about it. I've seen it all. She will go to kindergarten next year. I hope she doesnt talk to her teacher the way she talks to me.

In some ways I hate to see her go. She is a bright little girl and very smart. Unfortunately she thinks she can do what ever she wants and there will not get into trouble. She actually is the ring leader as far as getting others into trouble. I have tried to adhere to her mother's no spank rule. But this girl refuses to listen and no seems to get thru to her. I fear that the parents are not giving her the right lessons. There are always rules and dispbeying them always involves some form of punishment. But when no kind of punishment seems to phase a kid what should we do? She will soon be going to a daycare rather than this house care. I'm afraid that she will find that she is not "in charge" and she will not like their rules either. Me, I'm glad she will soon be out of my hair. Of course now I will have to remind the others that the way she has been behaving will make me call Santa. He won't be happy with her behavior either. But only time will tell. Have fun little girl, you may be able to fool your mamma but you can't fool me. Your new school will be more than you thought you would get.

Bully This!

2010-11-01T20:12:00.004-05:00

I can't help it. I've been thinking about my childhood. Why? Because I was picked on and bullied. Also I've thought about the teens who feel they have no choice but to end their lives. I was picked on and laughed at through out my years of school. In grammar school I was small, wore glasses and my last name rhymed with "tomater" so you get the picture. I was shy and small, a perfect target. High school was not much better. My sophomore year was a nightmare because three football players in my fifth period English class made fun of me. They taunted me because I realized I'd get better book report grades if I read harder, "classic" novels. I got straight A's. The football players picked easy books to read and got very bad grades. They gave me the name "Oswald". I dreaded going to class with them so much I threw up nearly every morning. I hated my life because I felt like a misfit and nobody wanted to know the real me. I spent a lot of time alone at school and at home. I was an only child so who did I have to talk to?

My parents talked to me. I didn't really think they understood. But they listened to me. They told me things like "laugh with them, when they laugh at you." I said that would not work. I tried it. It helped. At least I thought that they would never seem me upset. I could be a good actress. After all that is what I wanted to be. Still I was different so I spent a lot of time by myself reading or listening to music. I loved Broadway music. In my mind, I could play every part and sing every song. Too bad I never really could sing. In my junior year I got up the courage to try out for the Junior Play which funded the prom. I became another person. I took the major character role and ran with it. I was at home. Suddenly those football guys saw something different. They quit taunting me.

The question still remains today. What do we do to help those who are being bullied. Where are the parents? I didn't have many of the issues that we have today. I went to segregated schools and really never heard of homosexuality or many other problems children have today. But I was still different. I even told my kids later the same things that my parents told me when they were laughed at by someone. They listened. My oldest daughter had a hard time with a girl in her glass who made fun of her. I told her how to make a joke. The two ended up becoming friends. Who is there for these "misfits" now? I admit not enjoying a lot of my childhood. But my parents were there for me. Teachers were there. Neighbors were there. Ministers were there.

We must do something to stop the bullies. We all grow up. One day the bullies may have their own children. What will they say as parents? Who is at fault? Is it the school systems? Is it the parents? The issues of today are so much more difficult than mine were. What do we say to the kids who enjoy the "power" of being the bully? Does it make them feel important? Does it make them bigger? How many will end up in a life of crime? When will they look at themselves and be ashamed of what they did? I don't have an answer. I don't know why one child becomes a bully and the other one doesn't. I remember hearing Hillary Clinton say, "It takes a village to raise a child". Our village is not doing it's job. Maybe the village idiot is running things? We must stop this now.

That Time of Year Again

2010-10-13T12:57:00.003-05:00

Fall has arrived in several parts of the good old USA. I remember last year walking around the tiny town of Ozona, Texas. Ozona is not far from San Angelo, around west Texas. The colors of the leaves were so nice to see. All the yellow,red, gold and orange hues of leaves that were still on the trees. Here in Houston it is a different story. It is almost as if we have two foliage seasons - green and dead.

I have always liked fall. Fall, I think, is Nature's way of telling us that life is always changing and we should not take that lightly. Who among us hasn't had different seasons in their lives? Some good some bad, some colorful, others not. If you go around Houston there will not be much in the way of fall colors in the trees. If you want to see fall colored leaves, go to a store like Hobby Lobby or Michaels and buy some fake leaves and scatter them around. That is about the extent of our season of fall. You want fall decorations for your home? Go buy some pumpkin candles and decorate your house with the colorful leaves that you bought at Hobby Lobby or Michaels. That is it.

I envy those areas which have real colors of fall. The leaves hang on the trees just long enough for people to appreciate the season. Of course there disadvantages to living in an area where trees have colorful foliage. The leaves eventually fall off the trees. Then they turn brown and dead, just like here in Houston. They crunch when you walk through them, just like they do in Houston. The wind blows them all over yards and into streets where cars blow them around again, just like here in Houston. The difference is that unlike other places, here in Houston the trees are green one day and dead the next. Color, what color? Green or dead - not much choice.

So if you live in an area where the leaves change color, enjoy them. Sure you will still have to rake them just as we will, but remember that the colors remind us that there is a season for everything - even leaves.

Look Up, See What You Could Have Missed

2010-09-13T13:18:00.004-05:00

I've always liked to look at the sky. I love the variations of blue and the colors created at sunrise or sunset. To me these colors are a thing of beauty. Ever watched ducks fly in formation against a clear blue sky? Or the rays of sun projecting from behind a cloud? Sometimes a red morning sky can be breathtaking. Some parts of the country have "city" problems which make seeing the sky a little less alluring. Smog tends to obscure colors. Then again some people don't notice that grey haze lurking over a city. Maybe people are too busy with daily life to look up and think about what is going on up there.

I smiled at the "Peanuts" cartoon when Charlie Brown was lying on the ground looking up to the sky. At least he thought about what he saw. It doesn't seem to matter if the sky is clear and seemingly endless or angry and dark during a storm. There is always something to ponder. Even clouds tell stories. Who hasn't, like Charlie Brown, seen shapes or characters in the clouds. Those cummulus, cirrus, stratus, or nimbus clouds can tell how the day will go or if the weather will change. Flying in an airplane over the clouds can seem like flying above balls of cotton. Then again,trying to go around a thunderstorm in a plane can be a little scary to the average airplane passenger.

Looking up to the sky on any given day surely must make even non-believers wonder. Of course we can all talk about science and atmospheric conditions but those are numbers and laws of nature as a science. I remember when I wanted to grow up to be a meterologist - that is till I learned the dreaded "advanced math" would be involved. So I just settled for the artistic, or philosophical approach to looking at the sky. Yes, we can all see what we want to see in the bright colors or cloud formations.

Every once in a while even a jaded person like me can have an " oh my, look at that" moment. I was walking Daisy yesterday and had not really paid much attention to the sky. After all the sky is always changing and clouds always blow around. There are days when the blue seems very blue and the white clouds seem very white. Nothing was out of the unusual until I looked at the sky and noticed that two long, slender clouds had drifted together to form a perfect cross. I had to stop and look for a moment. Naturally, the philosopher in me wondered...why? I just stood there, looking. Then Daisy decided it was time to move along. When I looked back up, the cross had vanished. I guess it was a good thing that I looked when I did. I could have missed it. Was it a sign? I don't know. It was probably just two wandering clouds who decided to stop and say "Hi" to each other. Right?

I Found This, Reminds Me of a Lot of Politicians

2010-09-07T19:13:00.003-05:00

A powerful senator dies after a prolonged illness. His soul arrives in heaven and is met by St. Peter at the entrance.

"Welcome to Heaven," says St. Peter. "Before you settle in, it seems there is a problem. We seldom see a high official around these parts, you see, so we're not sure what to do with you."

"No problem, just let me in," says the senator. "Well, I'd like to but I have orders from higher up. What we'll do is have you spend one day in Hell and one in Heaven. Then you can choose where to spend eternity."

"Really, I've made up my mind. I want to be in Heaven."

"I'm sorry but we have our rules," replies St. Peter.

And with that, St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. The doors open and he finds himself in the middle of a green golf course. Nearby are all his friends and other politicians who had worked with him. Everyone is in evening attire and very happy to see him. They run to greet him, hug him, and reminisce about the good times they had while getting rich at the expense of the people. They play a friendly game of golf and then dine on lobster and caviar.

Also present is the Devil, who really is a very friendly guy and who has a good time dancing and telling jokes. They are having such a good time that the time flies, before he realizes it, the senator has to go. Everyone gives him a big hug and waves while the elevator rises.

The elevator goes up, up, up and the door reopens on Heaven where St. Peter is waiting for him.

"Now it's time to visit Heaven."

The next 24 hours pass with the senator joining a group of contented souls moving from cloud to cloud, playing the harp and singing. They have a good time and, before he realizes it, the 24 hours have gone by and St. Peter returns.

"Well then, you've spent a day in Hell and another in Heaven. Now choose your eternity." The senator reflects for a minute, then answers, "Well, I would never have said it, I mean Heaven has been delightful, but I think I would be better off in Hell."

So St. Peter escorts him to the elevator and he goes down, down, down to Hell. Now the doors of the elevator open and he is in the middle of a barren land covered with waste and garbage. He sees all his friends, dressed in rags, picking up the trash and putting it in black bags.

The Devil comes over to him and lays his arm on his neck.

"I don't understand," stammers the senator. "Yesterday I was here and there was a golf course and a beautiful club and we ate lobster and caviar and danced and had a great time. Now there is only a wasteland full of garbage and my friends look miserable."

The Devil looks at him, smiles and says, "Yesterday we were campaigning. Today you voted for us!"

Magnets...Chick Magnets That Is

2010-09-01T10:48:00.002-05:00

The other day I saw a survey about what kind of things attracts gals to a guy. Of course looks were on the list. Sunglasses were too. Why I don't know. Hair color and style were also on the list. But the number one chick magnet was a guy with a dog.

A guy walking a dog is more likely to attract a look from a female than just about anything else. So what kind of dog? Is a girl more likely to start a conversation with a guy who is walking a tiny dog or a big lab? Do shepherds make the list? How about a tall guy walking a short dachshund? Is a chick more likely to approach a guy walking a mastiff or a poodle.

Is a short, fat guy more likely to attract a girl if he is walking a dog opposed to not having a dog with him? Would a gal give a second look to to this guy if he didn't have a dog with him? If the guy is a handsome man walking an ugly dog, would he be noticed because he has a dog or because the guy is attractive?

I wonder if the kind of dog a guy has suggests what type of person he is. If the dog is mean, is the guy? If the dog is a nervous, yappy dog will a gal think twice before talking to the guy. Who wants to have a conversation with a guy while his dog is barking? What if the dog is a slobering type? Would the gal be less likely for fear of the slinging slobber?

So chicks like guys with dogs. It shows the guy is capable of giving and receiving love. It shows that he is usually caring and compassionate. On the other hand, if his dog is a big mean dog, would the chick want to take thc chance? Let's see how many men would approach a chick walking a rotweiler?

Tis the Season - Sort of...

2010-08-25T13:29:00.003-05:00

The children around here are back in school.Parents are happy. I thought of a song which used to be played on the radio this time of year for parents. It was also played at the end of the school year for the kids..."Happy Days Are Here Again". I also heard the old Andy Williams Christmas song..."...the Most Wonderful Time of the Year..." played on the radio. Tis the season.

We are still in the middle of hurricane season here. So far seven storms have blown up and out. Houston is in the middle of a heat wave with heat indices in the 105-110 range. We'd almost be happy with a litte bit of tropical weather - just not too much. The leaves on a couple of trees around here are turning yellow and falling off. Tis the season.

Halloween stores have been open a while now. I guess they expect people will be looking for costumes and decorations early this year. So where is all the candy? Oh, I guess all of that will be selling right after Labor Day. Tis the season.

Somewhere in the middle of all this Thanksgiving will appear. Some stores will have a turkey price war.I must remember to get some cranberry sauce. Maybe I'll just get sauced thinking of how often Thanksgiving is skipped right over into Christmas. After all some stores have already put some decorations on sale. Tis the season.

So since today is 4 months until Christmas day, let me be the first to wish everyone a Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year. Just forget Labor Day and Thanksgiving. Tis the season...

A Bunny Story

2010-08-11T09:27:00.000-05:00

Once upon a time there was a man who was peacefully driving down a windy road. Suddenly, a bunny skipped across the road and the man couldn't stop. He hit the bunny head on. The man quickly jumped out of his car to check the scene. There, lying lifeless in the middle of the road, was the Easter Bunny.

The man cried out, "Oh no! I have committed a terrible crime! I have run over the Easter Bunny!"

The man started sobbing quite hard and then he heard another car approaching. It was a woman in a red convertible. The woman stopped and asked what the problem was.The man explained, "I have done something horribly sad. I have run over the Easter Bunny. Now there will be no one to deliver eggs on Easter, and it's all my fault."

The woman ran back to her car. A moment later, she came back carrying a spray bottle. She ran over to the motionless bunny and sprayed it. The bunny immediately sprang up, ran into the woods, stopped, and waved back at the man and woman. Then it ran another 10 feet, stopped, and waved. It then ran another 10 feet, stopped, and waved again. It did this over and over and over again until the man and the woman could no longer see the bunny.

Once out of sight, the man exclaimed, "What is that stuff in that bottle?"

The woman replied, "It's harespray. It revitalizes hare and adds permanent wave."

Family, the Tie that Binds, even on Facebook

2010-07-22T12:20:00.003-05:00

I saw today that Facebook now has 500 million users now. And to think that the genius behind all of this is 26 years old. I've got clothes older than he is. I've been on it about a year now. My children are on it and I have quite a few friends on it as well. I even found my ex-husband on there. No, we are not friends. Not in this life or the next either. But I have met some nice, interesting people.

Anyone who is on Facebook has probably had the urge to check out an old friend from school or someone they have not thought about in years. I remember searching for an old high school friend. He's a priest now. I still find that hard to believe. I looked up my maiden name to see if I found anything. There were lots of them but I doubt any were related to me. That would have been quite a find. I only have one uncle left on that side. My father had four brothers and one sister. Through them I ended up with eleven cousins. It's sad to say but if I ran into to any of them I doubt I would know them at all.

The other day I had a sudden urge to look up the name of a cousin. She was six months younger than I. We spent many school summers together in New Jersey. My grandfather lived in New Jersey as did my uncle and aunt. My mother and I used to drive up from Alabama for a couple of weeks each summer and occasionally during Christmas breaks from school. My cousin and I were both only children. She had red hair. I sill remember cutting off her pig-tail. We got into a lot of trouble over that episode.

I put her name into the search. Imagine my surprise when I actually found her. She still has red hair. I knew instantly that was her. We lost touch many years ago and I haven't seen her since the early 70's. So now we are Facebook friends. After chatting with her I even discovered the my aunt and uncle are still alive. That was a surprise. My cousin said she would have them e-mail me. Thanks Facebook. I thought that tie was forever broken, but the family ties still are there.

Addiction or There's an App for That

2010-07-21T10:36:00.003-05:00

Ok, I admit that maybe I need to go into a virtual 12 step program to get me off "Farmville". I got on Facebook last year. Now I find that I have to see what is going on each day. And I thought Twitter was bad! I was addicted to that too. I even had TweetDeck which chirped every time a new tweet came in. My grandsons kept asking where were the birds.

This year I started playing "Farmville" a little more. Last year I didn't really do too much. Now it is serious business. I have to work my crops and do all the work around my farm. Sometimes I get the help of arboritists or farmhands. Mostly it is me who has to do all the harvesting. Oh, and I can't forget the co-op either. Jeez. Who know that simple games could be so addicting. You can apparently get "an app for that" for just about anything including Facebook games on any "smart phone." There is even one which will "analyse" a baby's cry to tell you what is wrong.

I find myself thinking every day that I need to go back to writing. Then I have the urge to see what is going on at my farm or my Hotel City, or my Social City, or my Mafia Wars, or Pet City, Happy Aquarium, etc... Get my drift?? I am beginning to think my life revolves around the games instead of real life. On the other hand, sometimes the games are more fun. I don't have an app for that on my phone... can't play games in the car. Of course the cops would not take too kindly to that anyway.

I used to laugh at people I knew who spent a better part of the day playing games instead of doing housework or cooking or anything else for that matter. Then I wondered what would happen to me if I didn't have the ability to play these games? Oh dear, can I stand one day without them? Uh...well, aw come on, just one game! Maybe the fun will wear off soon. Oh crap! Last time I looked my crops were 98% ready to be harvested. Can't let them go to waste. Gotta get thos coins so I can make my farm bigger. Sigh. And so it goes. There's gotta be an app...for quiting. Right?

For Those Who Have Ever Golfed

2010-06-15T09:07:00.002-05:00

A man went to the confessional. “Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.”

"What is your sin, my son?” the priest asked.

"Well,” the man started, “I used some horrible language this week, and I feel absolutely terrible.”

"When did you use this awful language?” asked the priest.

"I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 250 yards, but it struck a power line that was hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground after going only about a hundred yards.”

"Is that when you swore?”

"No, Father. After that, a squirrel ran out of the bushes and grabbed my ball in his mouth and began to run away.”

"Is that when you swore?”

"Well, no. You see, as the squirrel was running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons, and flew away!”

"Is that when you swore?” asked the amazed priest.

"No, not yet. As the eagle carried the squirrel away in his claws, it flew toward the green. And as it passed over a bit of forest near the green, the squirrel dropped my ball.”

"Did you swear then?”

"No, because as the ball felt it struck a tree, bounced through some bushes, careened off a big rock, and rolled through a sand trap onto the green and stopped within six inches of the hole.”

The priest signed, “You missed the putt, didn't you?”

Shadows on the ceiling

2010-06-15T08:32:00.003-05:00

The other day I was upstairs in the bedroom when I noticed shadows moving on the ceiling. Big deal, right? Of course the dancing of the shadows was a result of the tree limbs at the front corner of the building. It was a breezy day so the limbs were swaying to the song of the wind. The window curtains block the sunlight but not the motion of the shadows of everything from the neighbors walking into or out of their place or that tree. It is really in a bad place because the branches rub along the wall and gutters at the corner of the building. Quite annoying to those who live there.

I don't have to listen to the rustling of the leaves or the scraping of the branches along the walls. I had not really paid much attention to the shadows made by the tree though. That is until I decided to lie down on the bed because I had a headache. A couple of aspirin and a nap should cure the problem I thought. I soon forgot about the headache because I noticed the movement on the ceiling. The tree limbs were bending in the breeze, but from my vantage point the picture on the ceiling looked like giant legs of a spider. Almost like a nature video the "legs" moved up and down, stretched and curled just like any good spider.

For a moment I thought I was watching one of those old 50's horror movies. The giant spider is about to devour the building! Run for your life! Each leg seemed to move independently of the others. Slowly, they reached out to grab an imagined prey. Is this spider ever going to get the unsuspecting victim? Or are the legs waving to others to signal that the take over of the world has begun? I couldn't help but watch all of this. Ah, well so much for a wild imagination...

Wonder How Long It Took?

2010-06-04T13:17:00.002-05:00

Gotta love Spring. Flowers, weeds, bugs all come forward. If you like the time of year, you may like watching things. I do. I've always liked to watch things grow and see flowers bloom, especially if I grew them.

Occasionally I find myself watching and wondering about nature. Yeah we all have seen the fights between mockingbirds over the "ladies". I accidentally ran into a dove's nest a few weeks ago. "Excuse me - didn't mean to bother you". Even birds can give you "that look". Looking at butterflies I wonder about their colors and in some cases how far they flew to get here. Any vegetable garden is witness to crawling creatures foraging for food so they can move on to butterfly-hood. I have watched them chew their way through leaves or try to hide in among like colored leaves.

Then one day I watched a small green caterpiller moving along to what it hoped to be a good place to transform into that butterfly. At least I hope he was thinking. But the funny thing was he was inching along and trying to dine on a green sponge. Did he not think it was a little tough to chew? Never mind that the sponge color did not blend well with his body. Hum... It seemed to take a long time. I wonder how long it took for him to figure out that he was not crawling along a leaf? Was the taste, or lack there of, a clue? Or did a hungry bird grab him as a tender tasty bite first? I guess I will never know, but I wonder if he ever figured it out in time?

Biblical Theme Songs

2010-05-17T06:54:00.000-05:00

Noah: "Raindrops Keep Falling on My Head"
Adam and Eve: "Strangers in Paradise"
Lazarus: "The Second Time Around"
Esther: "I Feel Pretty"
Job: "I've Got a Right to Sing the Blues"
Moses: "The Wanderer"
Jezebel: "The Lady is a Tramp"
Samson: "Hair"Salome: "I Could Have Danced All Night"
Daniel: "The Lion Sleeps Tonight"
Esau: "Born To Be Wild"
Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego: "Great Balls of Fire!"
The Three Kings: "When You Wish Upon a Star"
Jonah: "Got a Whale of a Tale"
Elijah: "Up, Up, and Away"
Methuselah: "Stayin' Alive"
Nebuchadnezzar: "Crazy"

Finding Jesus...

2010-04-26T10:35:00.001-05:00

An old drunk stumbles across a baptismal service on Sunday afternoon down by the river.

He proceeds to walk into the water and stand next to the preacher. The minister notices the old drunk and says, "Mister, are you ready to find Jesus?"

The drunk looks back and says, "Yes, preacher, I sure am."

The minister dunks the fellow under the water and pulls him right back up.

"Have you found Jesus?" the preacher asks."Nooo, I didn't!" said the drunk.

The preacher then dunks him under for quite a bit longer, brings him up, and says, "Now, brother, have you found Jesus?"

"Noooo, I have not, Reverend."

The preacher, in disgust, holds the man under for at least 30 seconds this time, brings him out of the water, and says in a harsh tone, "My God, man, have you found Jesus yet?"

The old drunk wipes his eyes and says to the preacher, "Are you sure this is where he fell in?"

The End of the Journey for My Lady

2010-04-22T10:34:00.002-05:00

We all have best friends. They are always with us to cheer us or comfort us. They never question or fault us. My best friend of nearly 14 years was that way. She couldn't speak as you or I can, but boy could she express herself! She had four legs instead of two, but to me she was just as human as any other member of my family. Sometimes I thought she had better since than they did.

But now she was old and tired. She had seen many things happen during her life's journey. I tried to convince her to hang on just a few more days. But that was not to be. Lady had walked many a mile on her short legs. I remember when the kids went to get her so that she could be a member of the family. I laughed when she nervously crawled into the arm of Traci's school jacket because she was scared of riding in the car. I still remember the day she chased one of Pat's friends down the hall because she did not like him. As it turned out she had the right opinion of him.

Somewhere there are pictures of her. I'll have to dig through boxes to find them. Traci, Annie, Pat and Amanda have all been caught by the camera with Lady. So many times they all looked guilty...even Lady. Now there are grandchildren who are forever preserved in time with her. Cheyanne was the first to be "pictured". And of course Brad, Aryn, Skylar and Michael did too. There is even a picture of one of Brad's friends asleep on the couch with his arm around Lady. Lady tolerated it all. Sometimes she seemed to say, "Not again!"

Lady learned to work the system. Just how many times did she beg to be picked up into the beds with the kids? And how many times did she wait for the kids to come home only to pee on the carpet, floor, or bed in excitment? She was always happy to see the kids and grandkids.

She was not really happy to welcome Daisy. Lady made sure Daisy knew who was in charge. "It ain't you, kid" she told Daisy many times. Lady was truly the Grand Dame of the house. Even when she was introduced to Rowdy who she though of as just another "subject".

But over the last few months Lady began to feel less and less like bothering with any of us. As long as she could stay in her chair covered by her blanket she was happy to be left alone. But I began to notice that time was short. She began to lose weight and became more and more listless. Then she quit eating. Dachshunds usually only live 10-15 years. My first, Peanut, lived to be 14. Daisy is now 5 and Rowdy 10. Lady was 13. As the days past, I began to wonder how much longer I would have Lady around. Would come home from work to find that she had died? I really didn't want that. Should I put her down? She wasn't in any pain or suffering. What to do?

I decided to keep her comfortable and wait. We came home Tuesday evening to find her lying on the floor. She did not want to move. I knew the end of the journey was near. I hurried with supper and dishes. Then I picked her up out of her chair,wrapped her in a blanket and held her in my arms. Her breathing and heart rate were erratic and she seemed to have drifted off into a coma. Her eyes were glazed over and I knew her time was near. Even Daisy and Rowdy seemed to know. Instead of bouncing round from chair to chair, they stayed quiet and watched over her. We went to bed a little after. We took Lady in her blanket with us and put her on the bed. Daisy and Rowdy stood guard. A little after mid-night Lady's journey ended peacefully.

Rest in peace little Lady. Thanks for being part of our family. Long live the Grand Dame. See you on the other side someday.

God, Please Send Me Money

2010-04-19T13:00:00.000-05:00

Little Johnny wanted $100 for a new bike and prayed for two weeks, but nothing happened.

Then he decided to write God a letter asking for the money. When the local postmaster saw the letter addressed to “God, USA,” he decided to send it to the President of the United States.

The President was so impressed, touched, and amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5 bill.

Little Johnny was delighted with the $5 and wrote a thank-you note to God. It read: “Dear God, thank you for sending the money. However, I noticed that for some reason you had to send it through Washington, D.C. As usual, those crooks deducted $95.”

Walking Through a Mine Field

2010-04-17T12:03:00.003-05:00

The other day as I tended to the care of Dylan and Jade, I walked into their bedroom to see what was going on. They had been playing in there a while. As usual there were toys every where. So I decided it was time to clean up the room. They were not interested in helping. Snacks were their primary concern. So we went to the kitchen to find suitable snacks for them. While they ate I went back into the bedroom to survey the damage.

As I stepped back into this room I was startled to hear a noise. The tv was on but that is not from where the noise came. Apparently in my quest to enter the lair of the children I had stepped on a toy. In the process it had decided to do what toys do best, make enough noise to really irritate any adult within ear-shot. That is when I thought "walking around in this room is like walking into a mine field". Toys littered the floor, the beds and spilled out of the toy box which was in the closet. There are all sorts of dolls, guns, cars and other toys which when prompted by some sort of activity make all sorts of noise. Usually these are in the hands of the small children when they do this. But sometimes they lie in wait for an unsuspecting adult to bump into, step on, or pick up. It is then that all Hell breaks loose. A "laser gun" will suddenly emit a red beam of light along with a "Star Wars" type of sound which makes me wonder what it would be like to use such a weapon in real life. Or a battery operated race car will take off running, or a least the wheels will spin wildly. Jimmy Johnson's car should have such power! Or worse yet an especially annoying doll will lament "I don't feel so good".

Of course when trying to clean up this room, the toys all have to start the noise at the same time. But finding the toys can be a problem. The floor is littered with toys. Toys spill out of the toy box at will or hang precariously at the edge. Every time a toy from the floor is tossed into the box another jumps out and poses a problem for any one near. Of course none of these toys seem to have an off switch either. At times, walking into or around the room really can be an assault on the ears, feet or ankles. There should be hazard labels on the door. "Caution, enter at your own risk". I don't know how many times I have tripped on some toy that was lying peacefully quiet until I stepped on it. And just wait till the kids decide to either look for a particular toy or start throwing toys at each other.

I think I may have to request "Hazardous Duty Pay". After all walking into a child's room or attempting to clean it is dangerous work. You just never know if an Iron-Man mask is going to start giving orders, or a remote controlled car makes a run for it.And don't forget the tiny metal cars that become missiles when launched by a four year old. Mine fields do exist, especially in kids' rooms.

A Place to Rest

2010-04-17T11:20:00.002-05:00

I go by this place several times a week. There seems to be activity almost every day. Yet it seems to be quiet and peaceful almost every day. The grass is always green and the trees provide shade and a nice place for the birds to watch over every person who goes into the place. Sometimes during the day there is a large tent where many people gather to remember. Other days I will see a hole being dug or covered up with care. The ground is always clean and the grass is well manicured. Many flowers are brought there frequently by families. These flowers and other tributes are a constant reminder of someone who was loved.

Yes,it is a cemetery. All the headstones face the road traveled each day by hundreds of people, maybe even thousands. Do those that pass notice? Do they pay attention when they see people gathered as a loved one being buried? I don't know if anyone pays attention to what happens at this little place. But it does seem to be busy. Almost every day I see some kind of activity going on here. I guess you could use the old joke and say "people are dying to get in there", but there is much more to it.

If the headstones could talk, what would that say to each other? "Nice to meet you"? to a new addition? Or maybe "I've been here a while, you'll like it here"? Maybe even, "Hey, I like your design"? Or maybe they would just take note of all the traffic as it goes by every day. Would they wonder why nobody has come by to see them or put fresh flowers out for them?

I don't know how long this cemetery has been there. It seems to stretch far into the back. Some of it can barely be seen from the road. I've always been curious about cemeteries. Ghoulishly to some, I've always wondered how old a place like this it. What was the first grave there? How long ago? Who was that person? Is there a history there? Is someone important or famous laid to rest there?

I guess for most people a place like this is where they hope to be one day. I'm not much for that. I'd rather be cremated and save the land. But for others I'm sure there is a sense of security that they will ultimately find peace there in their own place to rest.

Hymns by Word Association

2010-03-18T08:09:00.000-05:00

A minister decided to do something a little different one Sunday morning.

He said, "Today, in church, I am going to say a single word and you are going to help me preach. Whatever single word I say, I want you to sing whatever hymn comes to your mind."

The pastor shouted out, "Cross!" Immediately the congregation started singing, in unison, "The Old Rugged Cross."

The pastor hollered out, "Grace!" The congregation began to sing "Amazing Grace, how sweet the sound..."

The pastor said, "Power." The congregation sang "There Is Power in the Blood." The Pastor said, "Sex." The congregation fell in total silence. Everyone was in shock.

They all nervously began to look around at each other, afraid to say anything.

Then all of a sudden, way from in the back of the church, a little old 87-year-old grandmother stood up and began to sing "Precious Memories."

Saint Who? Paddy What?

2010-03-17T13:28:00.002-05:00

What is all the fuss about? Green beer and green rivers. Why does everyone want to be Irish? Me I could care less. Other than the opportunity to drink a bunch of beer and eat corned beef etc, big deal. Yeah, I'll drink a few beers with ya but I don't care if the beer is green. People wear green so they won't get pinched. Pinch me and somebody is libel to get slugged.

I lost the joy of being "Irish" for a day a long time ago. My ex-husband was what I liked to call a "Professinal" Irishman. He insisted that we all wear green. He was downright nasty if we didn't. He had an "Irish" temper too which we all bore the brunt of on occasion. Too many occasions to suit me. Even though his last name was an obvious one, his family did not come from Ireland. Mine lived in Ireland at one point though, before they moved on to Scotland and France.

Didn't St. Patrick chase snakes out of Ireland? Ok. What about the guys who do rattlesnake roundups here? Why don't we have a party for them? What color should we make the beer?

So to all the "Irish" I say "Top O the Morning" to ya. But I'd rather wear a Scottish kilt thank you.

When Sex in the City Meets Wild Kingdom

2010-03-12T13:16:00.002-06:00

They walked into the room. Candles were lit giving the room a warm glow as they shimmered on the bar. Bath water had been drawn and was shining with bubble bath. Red rose petals were scattered on the bed. Champagne was chilling in a silver bucket.Soft music played in the background. Everything was perfectly set for the lovers tryst.

His strong arms engulfed her as he kissed her ruby red lips. Piece by piece their clothes fell to the floor. The lovers were oblivious to anything but each other. As they sipped their champagne they gazed longingly into each others' eyes. Their caressing touches fueled the fires of their passion. After the last drops of the champagne were finished they stretched out their naked bodies on the golden colored satin sheets. So sensuous they felt.The lovers joined their bodies in hot passionate love which consumed them both. Nothing would stop their pulse pounding love-making. Hours faded away as they caressed every inch of their bodies as they pleasured each other.

Unnoticed by the lovers were the others. In the heat of the lovers passion the audience awaited patiently for them to finish. The audience looked at each other as if to say, "If we did that they'd be mad." The three dogs just sat there,careful not to give themselves away. After all it was better than watching re-runs of "lassie". Finally. The lovers were spent. They could do no more. It was then the couple noticed the audience. Quickly the dogs discussed the lovers dance. Len, the old, grouchy dog, Carrie Ann, the young free-spirited one and Bruno, technical minded, but funny put their heads together. Finally they had come up with their scores. They eat help up their signs with the scores. Carrie Ann "10", Bruno "10", Len "9". Total score - 29 out of 30. A gold metal performance of the dance of love. After the scores were revealed, as if on cue, the dogs jumped of the bed and ran back into the living room. They grabbed some dog food and ran back to their rightful dog places in the quiet of the late night. Carrie Ann climbed into to her chair, Bruno jumped onto the sofa and Len the old grouch crawled into his spot and covered up so no one would see him. All is well.

Just Another Day of What the Hell...??

2010-03-05T07:53:00.003-06:00

Child care can be fun or it can be exasperating on any given day. Sometimes the kids say or do things that make you think or snicker at their logic. Then there are the tv programs which entertain the kids and sometimes annoy adults. PBS has some very good cartoons which cleverly teach words, colors, numbers, reading and math concepts. There are other channels which feature cartoons with interesting music. I wonder how many parents know that some of that music is classical. Chopin would be so proud.

I've long since gotten over Sponge Bob though I still don't understand the concept of a talking sponge wearing clothes who lives under the sea and his friend Patrick. Then there is the "Barnyard" cartoon which I had to look at several times to make sure I saw what I saw. I realize that television programing for children can take a stretch of the imagination for adults to watch but... So there is this family of cattle complete with parents and children. They are just like any average family. Mothers take care of children, run the home and teach the children while dads go off to do the manly jobs. But why do both the "lady" cattle and the "men" cattle have udders? I had to stop what I was doing to make sure I had not missed something. But the kids don't seem to mind at all. I, on the other hand find it a bit disconcerting to see a "cow" with a male voice doing chores.

Then there are on some channels the frequent commercials trying to sell mom or dad on the latest toys for the kids. I remember when all dolls did was just, well nothing. You posed them and changed their clothes or brushed their hair. Some dolls had houses and furniture. I played for hours with my doll house. Then came the baby dolls that talked. They still sound weird to me, even now. Oh but toy makers and children wanted more. So they made dolls that had to be fed. So where did all that stuff go after the kid fed the doll forty-seven times a day? Guess what? Next we have to have the baby pee and poop so they have to have a diaper change. How many mothers have bought extra diapers for those dolls?

But the real what the Hell moment is when I discovered Barbie had a dog that she has to potty train. Huh?? I saw a commercial which had a cute little doggie lifting his leg on a little "pad". There was even a little "pee" which wet the training pad. But wait, the puppy has to be trained to poop on the pad too. Oh joy! When I saw that commercial I did not know if I should cringe in disgust or laugh at the thought of a young child "potty training" a toy. And just how much does this little "gotta have" toy cost anyway? And what about the extra training pads for when little Fido misses or his human uses them all up in two days. Then what?

What is next on the horizon of popular toys and tv shows for kids? Hey Carly - what will you do when you grow up? "I love you, you love me...". Oh shut up Barney! I need a cup of coffee.

Jewish Country Songs

2010-02-25T12:55:00.001-06:00

* Honkey Tonk Nights On The Golden Heigh lo

* I Was One Of The Chosen People ‘Til She Chose Somebody Else

* Stand By Your Merch

* I'm Crying In The Manischewitz

* The Shikoas Gonna Hit The Fan!

* Four Thousand Years Of Sufferin' And I Had To Go And Marry You

* Eighteen Wheels And A Dozen Latkes

* You've Been Talkin' Hebrew In Your Sleep Since The Rabbi's Come To Town

* You Picked A Fine Time To Leave Me Schiemiel

* Yippee Ko Yi Oy!

There Are No Words

2010-02-22T09:23:00.002-06:00

I enjoy blogging and reading friends' blogs. I've been occupied with other things lately. I've been working part-time watching kids. One is in school and the other two and just 3 and 2. It never ceases to amaze me how fast they can get into something. So last week you can imagine my surprise and sudden sorrow when I checked on my blog friends only to discover that one of my oldest and dearest friends had died.

There are no words to describe how I felt.It is true we are, in the grand scheme of things, only here for a short time. I just wished had just a little more time with Dr John. I enjoyed his tales of Pigeon Falls. But now the trains have stopped. The residents there are quiet. The storyline has been cut short. Where will they go, what will they do. Nobody could tell a story like Dr John.

I remember his little comments to me on my blog as well as his "leave a comment" and other little "contests" he had to keep us motivated. Such an imagination he had. I actually won a couple of his contests. One prize was a tiny ceramic figure of two cardinals on a bare tree in the snow. Now that is a very special treasure for me.

How do you find the words to describe how much someone touches you? I never physically met Dr John, but he touched me. I never looked into his eyes but I saw God's love there always. When I was happy, he made me laugh. When I was lost, he always knew how to find me.

Over the years of my life I have had people come and go. I would like to think I have learned something from them. I know I learned from Dr John. Peace be with you my dear friend. It was my honor to know you. Thank you for being you.

Your Packages are Here, Oh Wait They're for Me.

2010-02-16T07:49:00.002-06:00

Every day is different. It's another chance. Sometimes it's good and sometimes not. And if you go back and think about the year before...well. Take last Valentine's Day. My son and his girlfriend took me to lunch. He gave me two roses. Last year said "Don't read anything into this" and gave me a book. This year he didn't give me a book.

"Your off Friday? That works out great! I've got three packages coming. Can you stay home and make sure they are delivered?" I said sure. It never entered my mind to even think what those three packages might be. He called me a couple of times during the day to ask it the packages arrived. "No, not yet." I said. Finally late in the afternoon after he had gotten home from work there was a knock on the door. Of course the three dogs went nuts. Guard dogs? No. Nosy, yes. I figured that it was his packages so I grabbed the dogs and tried to get them out of the way.

"Jill, it's for you..." he said. Just try wrestling with three dogs and answer the door. And how did he know the door was for me, anyway? So I open the door to discover a delivery person standing there with a big vase of a dozen red roses. Uh, for me? Oh and there was also a teddy bear and a box of chocolates. Click! Now, I see the light. The three packages were not for him but for me. Sneaky. Seems he had ordered all of this on-line. Sneaky. As much as I love to read, I'll take roses any day!

I will also never turn down Sunday morning breakfast made for me complete with a heart in the center of the plate. And I didn't have to wash the dishes either. Later we went to Fry's to drool over computers. A 1 terabyte hard drive sure would hold a lot of music or other stuff. Sigh... While there he decided to buy me a new mp3 player. So I picked out a nice blue 8 gig one. That's 2000 songs I could put on it. That's a lot of music, even for me. So far I've only put about 200 on it. Now I have to decide what else I put on it. A little country, a little rock and roll ( no Donny and Marie jokes here), Eagles, George Strait,Asleep at the Wheel, Rod Stewart. Billy Joel, etc. Now I have to figure out what else... Barry, Dave Koz, Nora Jones, Willie Nelson, Wynton Marsalis, Straight No Chaser, plus some old standards. Plus now I can add more of my jazz friends and some classical without driving other people nuts.

I'll be happy to answer the door if I can get roses.

Mozart Beyond the Grave

2010-02-07T13:16:00.000-06:00

When Mozart passed away, he was buried in a churchyard. A couple days later, the town drunk was walking through the cemetery and heard some strange noise coming from the area where Mozart was buried.

Terrified, the drunk ran and got the priest to come and listen to it. The priest bent close to the grave and heard some faint, unrecognizable music coming from the grave. Frightened, the priest ran and got the town magistrate.

When the magistrate arrived, he bent his ear to the grave, listened for a moment, and said, "Ah, yes, that's Mozart's Ninth Symphony, being played backwards."

He listened a while longer, and said, "There's the Eighth Symphony, and it's backwards, too. Most puzzling."

So the magistrate kept listening; "There's the Seventh... the Sixth... the Fifth..."

Suddenly the realization of what was happening dawned on the magistrate; he stood up and announced to the crowd that had gathered in the cemetery, "My fellow citizens, there's nothing to worry about. It's just Mozart decomposing."

Image of WHAT?

2010-01-31T10:03:00.002-06:00

Every so often we see news stories of some person who find the image of Jesus or Mary on a wall, tree, potato chip or piece of bread. We all wonder about the significance of that. What does it mean and why was this person "honored"? Sure those images are odd and make us wonder. But what if the image is not so "divine"? How about a snake? What does that mean?

We are having company later today. Since it is a dreary, cold day, Jimmy decided that chili would be good for supper. So I dug around it the closet where the big pot has been kept. We can make a lot of chili in that 10 gallon pot. As I brought it into the kitchen I took the top off. It was then I discovered something a little eerie. There was an image in the bottom of the pot of a coiled up snake. Huh? I did a double- take! What is that! I first thought that maybe it was marks from scraping the bottom of the pot. Nope it was a perfect picture of a snake. I could see that it was coiled around several times and very thin. I could distinctly see the head. Creepy to say the least. Now the next question is, what happened to the snake? I was reminded of the snake on Traci's porch in Waco. That one was moving. This one was just a picture in a pot.

Obviously we washed the pot and the image disappeared. So where is the snake? Is it still in the closet? Is it still alive? I don't think so. We were thinking of cleaning out that closet. Uh, well, now I'm no so sure. But curiosity is about to get the best of me. Do we have a house guest? Will I find remains of this snake somewhere in the house? Did it just take a nap in the pot and decide to move on to the outside world? I can't get the image of that snake out of my mind now. Is there a deeper meaning here?

What Do Buying a CD, Fire Trucks, and a Sprained Knee Have in Common?

2010-01-27T09:13:00.003-06:00

Why can't I think of the right lottery numbers and then win? Of course that is assuming I bought a ticket with those numbers. Why do I remember something I was going to do in the morning, late in the afternoon? Why did I think about the tv reports of some recent apartment fires in Houston and wonder if they all had a common attic. Deep thoughts for me I guess. Maybe too deep.

Yesterday I had planned to go buy the new Barry Manilow cd, "The Greatest Love Songs of All Time" which has some classic love songs, many of which most of us have heard from movies, tv, Broadway or other singers. Remember to go get it, remember to go get it. I forgot. By the time I remembered it was late in the afternoon, not a good time in Houston. Nuts, guess I'll just have to wait.

Then Jimmy calls, he's driving home, be home about 5-5:30 depending on traffic. As we talked, I was watching the tv news and thought about recent fires during the cold weather. There were pictures of apartment fires which put many people out of their homes. I wondered how many of these big complexes had common attics instead of firewalls between units. Why did I think of that? Jimmy gets home. As he comes through the door he says the neighbors in the unit in front of us are trying to put out a fire under the covered patio roof. All they have is a garden hose. I go outside and see the smoke billowing from under the roof and in the patio area of their unit. Not good, I think. I leash up my three dogs and go outside. In the meantime, two cop cars, two fire trucks and five fire department vehicles show up, lights and sirens going full blast. I even watched as a third truck arrived but was waved off. This one had a high bucket ladder but since the fire was not on top of the building it wasn't needed. The fire, it seems, was just in a small area.

As I walked around to the parking lot I watched the fire fighters poke and chop and dig around the walls to see what is going on. The dogs are excited. Theater for Daisy- "Everybody here to see me!". The other two don't know what to think. Then I accidentally trip and nearly fall. Who wants to fall in front of a bunch of firemen? Not me, after all they aren't calendar guys. Somehow I managed to remain upright but felt a sharp pain behind my right knee. Not a good sign. Finally most of the fire people leave. That is all but the supervisor who had turned off all the electricity and gas to the four units of our townhouse building. Ok, all but the burned unit can turn back on their gas and electricity. Lights, no problem, got to reset all clocks, microwave and coffee maker. And since the gas company won't light (or re-light) pilot lights Jimmy has to go up into the attic way in the back and re-light the water heater. Not fun for him. But we did learn that our fourplex has firewall between units. That was the one good thing.

But now I am hobbling along with a sprained or torn knee ligaments. Ever try to go up or down stairs without a working knee? Of course the back of my knee throbbed all night long. I tried to take the dogs out this morning- nope, not gonna work! Anyone want to walk the dogs for me? Maybe I should just try to focus my thoughts on better things- say George Clooney??

Improvements in Hell??

2010-01-15T08:16:00.000-06:00

An engineer died and ended up in Hell. Soon, he became dissatisfied with the level of comfort in Hell, and began designing and building improvements. After a while, they had flush toilets, air conditioning, escalators. The engineer was a pretty popular guy.

One day God called to Satan and said with a sneer, "So, how's it going down there in Hell?"

Satan replied, "Hey, things are great. We've got air conditioning and flush toilets and escalators, and there's no telling what this engineer is going to come up with next."God exclaimed, "What? You've got an engineer? That's a mistake--he should never have gotten down there in the first place. Send him back up here."

"No way," replied Satan. "I like having an engineer on the staff, and I'm keeping him."

God threatened, "Send him back up here now or I'll sue!"

Satan laughed and answered, "Yeah, right. And just where are YOU going to get a lawyer?"

One Never Knows What the Day Will Bring

2010-01-12T09:00:00.006-06:00

I have always heard that we should look forward to the day. Tell that to someone who didn't get any sleep the night before! On the other hand for me, today is one of those what next days. At least it is starting out as a what next type of day. Now remember I didn't say bad, just what next?

Taking three dogs out early in the morning can be an adventure on a workday morning. Will they co-operate or not? Will they waste my time or not? I never know which one of the trio will be the winner. The Grand Dame Lady usually is dependable and gets her job done because she wants to get back inside so she can get onto her chair to survey the underlings' deeds. Daisy, on the other hand, is a social butterfly who thinks life should come to a stand still when she is showing off outside. Most of the time she adheres to the rules of the job. But not always. Rowdy is, well, a "what shall I do or not do today" type of dog. I never know. Of course when I'm in a hurry - he's not.

Then the Trans Am is picky in the colder weather. Sure it is easy to warm up. But just try to guess if it will get out of park and into gear easy. From one day to another I just never know. Today, language that would make a sailor blush came out of my mouth. I was not amused. As a result I have decided that today I will be THE drama queen just because I can.

Now the fun has begun. I got a call from Amanda asking me to go into their bedroom to retrieve a letter that needs to be mailed. No problem, right? That door is kept locked. Why? Just how many times have your little kids gotten into something and smeared it or written on something with eyeliner, or worse. Ok, no problem. Typical bedroom door, no key needed. But it's locked from the inside. Just in case, they keep a tiny screwdriver above the door out of harm's way of small children. Since, I'm short I have to have a little extra height to get the "majic door opener". So in the best traditions of the CIA, and 007 I picked the lock, entered the room, grabbed the evidence, and sent it to the next operative. I thought of all those times I've seen movies or tv shows where someone gets a little case out of a pocket, grabs, a little instrument, sticks it into the lock and voila! The door opens!

So much for my foray into espionage. Like I said one never knows what the day will bring. I'm ready, I think. Any body need a dog whisperer, supernanny, or secret agent? I said I was THE drama queen today, remember.

Whatever Happened to Conway Twitty?

2010-01-08T09:13:00.002-06:00

A young pastor moved to town and decided he would go around and introduce himself to the new congregation. He rang the first door bell and a lady came to the door. She stared at him as he introduced himself.

She said, “I can't believe how much you look like Conway Twitty, the country music singer.”

He replied, “Yes, ma’am, I hear that a lot.”

He went to the next house and the next, and every lady that came to the door said the same thing—that he looked like Conway Twitty.

At the last house, a shapely young lady came to the door with a towel around her. He started to introduce himself, but she loosened her towel, threw her arms in the air, and screamed, “Conway Twitty!”

The pastor stood there, stunned. Then he said, “Hello, darling!”

The New Year is Nearly Here

2009-12-31T08:43:00.003-06:00

As I think about this last day of this year I hope that all of you will have a year that is better than the one ending tonight. For some, 2009 was good, others not so much. There is no sense in rehashing what went right or wrong. All we can do is say we survived. Hopefully we all learned something during the long(or short) days and nights of 2009. We must all learn to be content and at peace with ourselves. None of us know how long we will be here so we must vow to be and do the best we can.

In this coming year give someone a smile, say please and thank you. That costs nothing. When you have the urge to lash out in frustration or anger, stop and think, is this the best I can do? You will make mistakes. Learn from them. None of us is perfect. Remember your family because they are not always right and they frequently make you mad, but they are your family. Sometimes you want to disown them. Just remember they hurt and heal just as you do. Time and patience are the great healers.

Enjoy your friends and cherish them because if you don't they may vanish like smoke. Remember friends are never earned, they are a gift from a loving God.After all those friends picked you to be a friend. Treat your co-workers kindly too. Some of them may not be as smart as you are. Give them a break even though you might want to smack them on the back of the head.

Live each day as if it were your last. You never know, it might be. Smile at yourself when you look into the mirror. After all, you will be another year older sometime in 2010.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!

Sometimes I Know How She Feels!

2009-12-28T11:09:00.000-06:00

An elderly woman in her nineties had a visitor from her church come to see her at the nursing home.

“How are you?” the visitor asked.

“Oh,” said the elderly woman, “I’m just worried sick!”

“You look like you’re in good health. They take good care of you here, don’t they?”

“Oh, yes, they take good care of me here.”

“Do you have any pain?” the visitor asked.

“No, I can’t say I do,” the elderly woman replied.

“Then what has you worried sick?” the visitor asked.

The elderly woman leaned in and explained, “All of my closest friends have already died and gone to heaven. I’m sure they are all wondering where I went!”

Chloe's Gift- With a Little Help From The Biggio Elves

2009-12-16T08:46:00.005-06:00

Her name was Chloe and a form of cancer took her just two days before her ninth birthday. With the help of her family, her friends, and Craig Biggio and his family, Chloe's spirit lives on in each teddy bear handed out.

It happened Tuesday morning at the Clinical Care Unit at Texas Children's Hospital. Build-a-Bears for every sick child and it was all Chloe's idea.

"It came straight from her head. Build-a-Bear was one of Chloe's favorite things to do, to go to the stores and build bears. The first time she decided to do it for the patients was her first year that she spent in the hospital on chemotherapy which was December 2006. She said she knew she would be in the hospital that Christmas, but she also knew that she would not be the only one there so she wanted all the patients on the floor to have a bear. That's how it started," said Chloe's mother, Joyce Castillo. "Chloe physically went around and handed out the bears."

It just so happened that at the same time Chloe was in the hospital, Craig's son Connor was in Texas Children's successfully fighting a blood infection.

"We got a knock on the door and it's Chloe and her Dad. She doesn't recognize me, but the Dad does. He says, 'Chloe, this is one of the Astros.' And she goes, 'Is that my favorite player, Jeff Bagwell?' And I go, 'No I'm not, but he's my favorite player too," said Craig Biggio. "That's how we started a relationship. She's a very special girl. Unfortunately, she's not here anymore, she lost her fight, but we didn't want to see this go away."

Craig and Patti's daughter Quin had a birthday party with her friend Kaitlyn and instead of gifts, they asked for Build-a-Bear certificates and everyone made a bear. So did Chloe's friends and family and Tuesday they brightened up a lot of faces at that special time of year.

"It makes me feel really great to make other kids feel happy, even when they're sick," said Quin.

It's a tradition Chloe started and her family and the Biggios will see to it that. That's what Chloe wanted.

"We lost Chloe about 18 months ago, We want to continue to honor our daughter and her legacy. We know how much this meant to her," said Castillo.

Craig said, "One of her last days here, I brought Jeff Bagwell up and she got to meet him. They're a very special family and she was a tremendous girl."

For everyone who's helping continue Chloe's dream, one little lady said it all.

"Thank you!" she said.

Craig helped Chloe get involved with the Sunshine Kids and she participated as long as she could. A big heart in a little girl who was thinking of others. It's a real Christmas story.

(Copyright ©2009 KTRK-TV/DT. All Rights Reserved.)

Easy Come, Easy Go- Well Maybe

2009-12-14T11:52:00.002-06:00

I have survived the first week of Nanny Duty. Right now it is eerily quiet because they are now watching a cartoon show instead of racing around the house. First they emptied the toys out of the toy box and used it as a hiding place. Then the three year old decided to race his litle Nascar 24 around the house. He can't be Spiderman today because his little costume has a number of holes. Actually if he sneezes it might just fall apart. He just doesn't get the fact that without his costume he has no powers. Oh well powers come and go with kids.

After several years without money, it was good to have a little extra. Of course that little extra came and went quickly. Funny how that happens. We decided to use the extra money to get new sheets and a comforter set for the bed. After eight years it was time for something new. The last new set we got was around the time my grandson Brad was born. Eight years is a long time for a bed set. The skirt was so ripped up I tripped and bitched a lot. So we splurged on a new set. We went from green cotton to brown suede. We bought some light chocolate milk sheets which were 400 thread count, very soft. Now I wonder what the 800 count feels like.

We also bought some dvds and cds which I had been looking at for a while. I'd been debating with myself on getting this and when I found a good deal, I took it. I also salivated over PCs and laptops at Fryes...Hey Santa...Sigh.

Then I thought of easy come, easy go. A week's work done and so was the money. It's a good thing I'm part Scottish. In other words tight with money. Now I have to wait another week. Funny how things add up. I just thought all that money was mine...

The More Things Change, The More They Stay the Same.

2009-12-10T13:45:00.002-06:00

I knew what to expect when I moved back to Houston for the most part. Houston traffic has not changed. The Texans are still waiting to improve. In other words, no championship again this year. People are still the same. The dogs, Lady and Daisy got right back into the rhythm of things. Of course now they have to put up with Rowdy. Two girls against one boy. And of course now there are two cages in the dining area with two rabbits in them. Well, after all it did freeze and we didn't want the rabbits to get too cold. I can't believe the dogs haven't try to bother them.

Sometimes things just fall into place unexpectedly. I started work as a nanny for Amanda's boyfriend's kids. He's had some problems with childcare, but he's lucky because his company is very understanding about his situation as a single dad. It was timing I guess because I was thinking of trying to figure out how to make a little extra money. Amanda asked if I would be interested and of course I said sure. So I go to their house and watch the two little ones all day while dad works and the older child, David goes to school. The two younger ones are a boy,three and a girl, two.

Sometimes I do feel like SuperNanny Jr. At two and three, the kids think that can do what they want. I sometimes think that the older one thinks he can push me around. Ha He apparently has never met the immovable object...me. And of course the word "no" seens sometimes to be spoken in a foreign language to him. If I say no, or stop, he just looks at me...Yeah, just keep pushing kiddo. I do think that after a couple of days he is begining to realize that I don't play that game.

Amanda texted me the other day to ask how it was going. I said fine. I haven't killed the kids yet and the house is still standing. Of course that was before I untied them and pulled the tape off their mouths. No, I didn't really do that! I do remember those days when my kids were little and tried to battle me. They lost that war too.

It's not a bad gig for some extra money. Now where did I put my extra set of eyes...oh yeah! Hey kids quit swinging from the ceiling fans!

What Do You Mean I Can Only Pick One?

2009-12-07T12:48:00.002-06:00

I'm getting back into the swing of things here. Lady and Daisy have a new playmate. Rowdy is a tiny mini dapple dachshund. So far they seem to get along. I'm not even going to try to explain the rabbits. Yes I said rabbits. I don't plan to walk them.

Part of getting back into the routine has been watching football. Until this last game I really thought the Houston Texans had a chance to get into the playoffs. Now it's just another version of wait till next year. But I have discovered that I am in the middle of a serious conflict. No, not between Jimmy and me or the three dogs, but football. I've tried to keep up with the progress of my two favorite college teams,Texas and Alabama. All season long Florida, Texas and Alabama continued to win. Florida held the #1 ranking all season, followed by Texas and Alabama as either #2 or #3. Each took on their rivals and won the games. Sometimes they won pretty, other times they all won ugly. As good as Florida has been over the last couple of years, I was positive they would win the SEC Championship, putting them against Texas in the BCS National Championship game. But oh no, the Football Gods had a wicked sense of humor. I knew it would culminate with the annual conference championship fight of Florida vs Alabama. Florida, being the better team, would beat Alabama. I would be sad, but I figured Texas could beat the Gators for the National Championship. At least my Horns could be #1. So who is the idiot who threw the monkey wrench into the mix? What I didn't expect was for the Crimson Tide to roll all over the Gators! I watched the game and could not believe what I was seeing! Bama had not played this well all season as far as I could see. Now things started to get dicey. Huh?? Alabama beat Florida??! Hum, now what? I assumed that Texas would beat the 9-3 Nebraska team for the Big 12 title. Once again the Football Gods played a dirty trick on me. The Longhorns actually, to me, lost that game! With one second left in the game the Horns kicked a field goal to win the game. The whole game was hard to watch. Talk about a nail biting type of game! Yikes! How in the world...???!!! I had visions of the BCS folks pulling their hair out. If Texas lost, chaos would have erupted like a volcano. TCU and Cincinnati would have screamed for a shot at the championship. Even Boise State would have said they deserved consideration. But by the grace of the Football Gods, the Horns eked out a literal last second win. Whew!

But alas I now find myself with a question. Who do I pick to win? All year I watched my teams continue to win. Now that they are playing each other for that football trophy and bragging rites of "We're #1!" I'm conflicted. Texas or Alabama? Longhorns or Crimson Tide? Why me? Why do I have to pick one over the other? I'm a longtime Texas fan and I'm a lifelong Alabama fan. What do you mean I can only pick one?! Ok, which one?

Back Home in Houston- So Where's the Snow?

2009-12-04T11:25:00.003-06:00

I think it's called back to basics. I'm trying to remember what and how to do things here. I haven't cooked in over eight months. So how do I turn that stove on?

The neighborhood hasn't changed much but I'm not thrilled with what has been done with the street at the front of the neighborhood. The powers that be have finally decided that the street must be widened. Perry Road is a very busy place for sure. But by widening it we've lost our yard. The dogs have no place to walk other than the neighborhood streets. I'm not thrilled about that and neither are they.

When Lady and Daisy walked in, they discovered a new dog in the house. That must have been a come down. Rowdy is a male mini-dachshund, dapple colored. He thinks he is in charge.The girls don't think so. They are getting along well though. But Rowdy does not seem to get the message that he is supposed to do somethings outside. Of course dachshunds are stubborn. But so am I.

Oh there are two more additions here. Two dwarf rabbits that were Amanda's but she didn't have room for them when she moved. Now they have taken up residence on the patio. Let's see- three dogs, two rabbits and two fish tanks. Just your average zoo.

All week long the weather forecasters talked about snow on Friday. How come it always snows around me but not where I want it? It snowed here last year on Dec.10th. With today's snow it is the earliest ever snowfall. So where's mine? It snowed in the little town where we used to live and it still falls. So far, I'm disappointed cause I've only seen a few flakes. So where is the 3-5 inches in my neighborhood? Ah ha! I see two flakes flying freely. Hey! Come back here! Drop all those inches right here! I want to see what three little dogs would do in a snow drift! Would you believe disappear?

Oh joy, now the dogs want to go out. Oh wow, what do I see? Another flake...

Things to Remember This Holiday Season

2009-11-24T09:19:00.002-06:00

1. Someone in this world loves you.
2. A smile from you can bring happiness to someone - even if they don't like you.
3. Every night someone thinks about you before they go to bed.
4. You mean the world to someone.
5. Without you, someone may not be living.
6. You are special.
7. When you make the biggest mistake ever, something good comes out of it.
8. When you think the world has turned it's back on you, you probably turned your back
on the world.
9. When you think you have no chance to get what you want, believe in yourself and
sooner or later you will get it.
10.Always remember the compliments you receive, forget the rude remarks.
11.Tell someone how you feel about them. They will feel better when they know.
12.Thank God you are alive.

Replacing the Dynamic Duo isn't Easy

2009-11-20T13:32:00.009-06:00

The Dynamic Duo, also known as Bailey and Landry has broken up. I'd like to say it was creative differences, but it wasn't. It seems their manager, Annie came to the conclusion that the workload of the fun loving twosome was more than she could handle. Maybe there just weren't enough hours in the day for all that had to be done. And of course traveling with the two of them plus two little boys would be a comedy of errors. Just visualizing Jason and Annie in the front seats while Skylar and Michael share the back seat with two labs. All of this in a Neon. I wonder who would actually drive the car?

The show must go on but the duets won't. Alas, like other great teams, times change. Look at history- Anthony and Cleopatra, Abbott and Costello, Dean Martin and Jerry Lewis, Brad and Angie(the jury is still out on that one) where are they now? Nothing lasts forever. So Bailey and Landry are now working solo. A friend of the family took Landry and now Bailey patiently waits to see if she'll come back.Or maybe she wonders where she will go. Sadly due to the size and lack of time as soon as a good home can be found, Bailey will be working on a new act too.

In the middle of this gut-wrenching decision an interloper joined the group. Annie, ever the soft touch, drove into the driveway last week and discovered a tiny chihuahua sitting there. Lost and forelorn, the little thing was an instant hit with the boys. Jason suggested to Annie that she put a notice of "lost dog" in the paper. Seceretly hoping no-one would call, Annie reluctantly did it. So far there has not been much interest. So after getting a bath to rid him of an entire town of fleas Nacho has made himself at home. At least he will be easier to travel with compared to two labs. Only time will tell. Who knows how this sory will end.

We are going back to Waco for Thanksgiving so we will see how Nacho handles car rides.He's become Annie's little shadowman. At Christmas Annie, Jason, the boys and Nacho will go to El Paso to see Jason's family. The dachshund duo and I will stay in Waco. While the Dynamic Duo has broken up, the new star, Nacho, seems to enjoy his role. Not exactly the same as two black labs, but just try to keep up with what amounts to a barking Mexican Jumping Bean.Only time will tell what happens next.That's show biz.

I Go Out Walking

2009-11-13T09:30:00.003-06:00

I go out walking, not a midnight, but during the day. Walking around the tiny hamlet of Ozona is a little like going back in time. Most of the buildings here are very old, some more than 100 years old. There are large mansion size old homes that must be over 50 years old as well as neighborhoods where the homes seem to be stuck in the 50's and 60's eras. Some homes are of brick or stone while others are made of stucco. There are others that make me think a siding salesman hit the jackpot. Once in a while there may be turkeys wandering around the yards.

I think my mother, who was an artist, would have enjoyed painting here. Just looking at the rustic buildings and the colors of the trees would have made her look for a place to sit and create. Walking around all the trees can be a bit of a trick sometimes. The oak trees are shedding the acorns. Walk by the local Church of Christ and my feet crunch constantly the acorns that have fallen on the sidewalk. I guess the squirrels have picked up all they want. If I really wanted to, I could probably bag a lot of pecans. Everyday I hear them fall onto the carport. Slap, bang, clunk is an ongoing sound. They fall on the lawns, driveways, and streets. Daisy can't figure out what to do with them. Sometimes I would like to shell a bunch of them and eat them for snacks.

Probably the most appealing sights to me are all these trees. Of course there are all the old oak and pecan trees. But there are others, too, like maple, hackberry and cypress. As I go out walking I can see the gradual color change of the leaves. I didn't see very much of this in Houston. As I look around at the trees swaying in the breeze I notice how vibrant the colors are. As the trees get ready to shed their leaves, Mother Nature takes control. Like my mother, she is an artist. There are trees still wearing green while others have been colored with the brilliant gold or yellow leaves. Others have been painted orange or dark red. My mind's eye must savor this because in a matter of weeks the leaves will give up and fall to the ground. The streets and lawns will be littered with dying leaves that will turn brown.

There are not many places here that cannot be reached by walking. But not every area has sidewalks. And of course being a small town I think those sidewalks are rolled up after sundown. Much of Ozona "shuts down" early. There is no WalMart or even a McDonalds. There is a Sonic. But there is no movie theater, certainly no "chain" stores. For those, it's 1 1/2 hour drive to San Angelo. Plan ahead is the key. Ozona is a relaxed sort of place. Nobody rushes, unless they are late for church. Most of the residents don't even lock the doors at night. They don't even worry about locking their car doors or leaving things in them. I can't get over that.

Walking around here makes me think of lots of different things. There is a certain peace here. "The stars at night are big and bright, deep in the heart of Texas" to quote an old song. But then I also think:

...The woods are lovey, dark and deep,
But I have promises to keep,
And miles to go before I sleep,
And miles to go before I sleep.

From the poem Stopping by Woods on a Snowy Evening by Robert Frost

Epitaph to My PC

2009-11-06T13:38:00.002-06:00

My dear computer it is hard to see you sit there waiting but not willing.
You worked hard for me, You helped me keep up with news and friends.
My thoughts of all kinds were kept on you, You never told unless I said to.
With you, I entangled myself in the world wide web.
I found prices on everything from air-fare to houses, cars and yes even computers.
I learned a lot of things thanks to your searches.
You and your big monitor companion were the top of the line when we bought you.
Was it seven years ago? More or less I can't remember. We've been through it all.
We moved you from several different homes. You never complained,well maybe a little.
You got sick when you were still under warranty. But you were fixed and continued on.
When I had no cd player, you happily played everything from oldies to the new stuff.Thanks to you and your partner, the monitor I could keep up with TV shows.
I even kept up with my sports teams when I could not see them on TV.
But you as you got older, you didn't want to work as hard. Disk boot failures, etc.
We thought about replacing you. Yes the newer machines are sleeker, smarter, faster.
You didn't complain when we had to to find a new place to live.
Off to Waco we went. A new life for both you and I. We even went to Ozona together.
Your virtual memory started complaining and you lost connection a lot.
Sometimes you buffered painfully slow. Then without warning, it happened.
I turned you off because we were going to Waco for Halloween trick or treating.
When we came back I pushed your button as usual. But something was not right.
As if to tell me your life's work was done, you left a message on the monitor.
"Dr. Jason" examined you. Sadly, your illness was terminal.
Oh I guess I could get you a new hard drive, but at your age? Maybe death is better.
I can't say "Dear PC,I don't think I like you anymore" as Rodney Carrington would.
I don't know how I will go on without you for I have resisted laptops. But...
For now I'll have to muddle through on the family pc's here and in Waco.
Twitter, Facebook, and the Malitz Muse will not be the same without you PC.
Rest in Peace PC. You did your job well. I will miss you.

Street Gang in Heaven?

2009-11-05T12:22:00.001-06:00

One day St. Peter saw a street gang walking up to the Pearly Gates.

St. Peter ran to God and said, "God, there are some low-life street gang members at the Gates. What do I do?"

God relied, "Just do what you normally do with that type. Redirect them."

St. Peter went back to carry out the order, but he suddenly came running back and yelling, "God, God, they’re gone! They’re gone!"

"The street gang?"

"No, the Pearly Gates!"

There's Gotta Be a Pony in Here Somewhere.

2009-11-03T11:21:00.002-06:00

There are days when we all have things go bad. I can certainly relate to that fact. Some of us handle things better than others.Me, I tend to get crabby. Me-crabby? Hell, yes. Sometimes I almost want to say "what the Hell did I do to deserve this?" It's then I have to remind myself of what I do have. What would I do without my daughters Annie and Traci? I don't even want to think of that. I'm very lucky and blessed to have them.

Then there are days when I finally make up my mind to look forward. Ok, I'll talk to Jason, see what he thinks. Hummm. Interesting. Then I talk to Bobby. Ok,they both think I can do this. So I start researching things. Well this might take a while to accomplish what I need to do. I need to do this, I need to do that. Oops, I stepped in that hole again. Now I have to brush off the shit and re-think things. Oh, ok, this is not impossible. Yeah, no car, no job. But, this is not insurmountable, keep looking ahead. Let me check out some things online. Uh...what is this?

Yet another problem I have found. Jeez, come on. Just how much of this shit do I have to shovel? After coming back from Traci's house for Halloween, I turn on my computer. What is this? According to my pc, it's dying. When I turned it on, it presented me with an ominous message. My hard drive might(is) bad. Jason checked it out for me. Yeah,it looks like the patient (pc) is terminal. Crap! More shit! In my mind's eye I see yet another roadblock. So, what do I do now? I'm lost.

Then this morning I see a Bible passage. Hebrews Chapter 10, verse 35 "Cast not away...your confidence which hath great recompence of reward". I guess I'm supposed to "keep the Faith, baby". I read somewhere that when problems keep being put in your way, the reason is that the Enemy knows you are improving and moving forward and this is his way to discourage you. Or it could just be that I keep getting into all this shit cause if I did deep enough I'm gonna find a pony and it will be a Grand Champion! I'd like to think so.

The Misadventures of Bailey and Landry

2009-10-27T13:48:00.004-05:00

In case anyone cares - it was cold last night! It was a three dog night and I'm short on dogs. Lady and Daisy aren't quite enough. We could have had four dogs in the house. We did for a while.Just imagine two mini-dachshunds and two labs all in the same room. Let's see I fished two toys out of the labs mouths yesterday. Hum. The labs usually stay outside but...

Annie got a call saying her dogs had gotten out and were roaming the street. Luckily they were found and brought back. Bailey and Landry (named after characters on "Friday Night Lights") were very, very naughty. Yes, even Supernanny, Jo Frost would probably not have been happy with them. So how did they get out? Over the last several weeks I had seen them standing at the fence. They would stand on their hind legs watching me take Lady or Daisy out in the front yard. Bailey and Landry would bounce around on their hind legs, wagging their tails. They wanted to play. It occurred to me that if they gave it some thought they could easily jump the fence. So when they went awol Annie and I figured that might be what they had done. When they escaped a second time, we really got worried. I was outside walking Lady when the two labs came bounding up the street to see us. Want'a play? We ended up bringing them inside until we could think of something.

Of course bringing two BIG dogs inside was not what Lady and Daisy wanted, not to mention what Willy, the cat, thought. So after grabbing the toys out of the "big mouths" we had to clean all the toys up and put them out of reach. The labs just wanted a little fun. Willy was not happy with the chase game. Daisy bared her teeth every time they came near her. "Don't you dare put your paws on me" she seemed to say. Lady just growled. She stood her ground against the giants. Daisy tried to run and hide, except when Annie brought the BIG rawhide bone inside that Bailey and Landry like to play with. Daisy actually swiped it out from under them!

For some reason Bailey and Landry liked to follow me around the house. Every where I went they followed. They oddly seemed at ease around me and stayed "calm and submissive" as "The Dog Whisperer" Cesar Milan would say. I would think it a little crazy myself but for the fact that most dogs seem to like me. I don't know how many times I have been some place where they was a mean or annoying dog. The owners would always tell me "He's mean or he bites..." Not me! I sit down and almost any dog thinks suddenly I am the best friend! Maybe they think I look like a dog? I don't think I smell like a dog. At least no-one has told me that. Sometimes I wonder if dogs liking me is a good thing or a bad thing.

Later when Jason got home from work he went out to the back yard, thinking that Bailey and Landry might have to be tied onto a lead outside for a while. Let's face it. Two big, lovable dogs and two little boys could spell trouble inside a house. The dogs could stand up at the counter and steal supper with no problem. Lady and Daisy have to wait until something drops. But Jason found the problem. The dogs had not jumped the fence has we had suspected. They just walked out the back of it. It seems that one side which was connected to the neighbor's fence had come loose making a nice open door. Aha! The escape route had been found. Once Jason solved the problem, the fence was once again intact. The adventures of Bailey and Landry came to an end. Further escape was foiled. That is until they really learn how to jump the fence.

Woman Gets Ticket For Not Speaking English

2009-10-23T10:37:00.002-05:00

A Dallas area woman's daughter missed the school bus. So naturally the mother was a little bit upset. She hurried to her car to take her daughter to school. In her rush she apparently forgot to grab her driver's license. Oops! That was her first mistake. I'm sure there are many of us who have done the same thing. Shame, shame.

The woman got pulled over by a Dallas police officer for making an illegal U-turn. He also ticketed her for no driver's license and then he also gave her a third ticket for being a non-English speaking driver. Say what? Well there is a federal law that says commercial drivers must speak English. But there is no such state law for individual drivers in Texas. The woman is learning English so it is not as if she spoke no English at all. For most people it is humiliating enough to get one ticket while taking a child to school. She got three.

Of course the media jumped all over this story. The Dallas Police Department regretted what happened and said they thought it was clearly a mistake by an officer in training. The woman said it seemed to her that the rookie cop needed more training. A court dismissed the non English speaking driver ticket. I just hope she doesn't plan on getting a job as a commercial truck driver. At least until she has learned to speak English a little better.

Persistence Pays, Or How to Annoy the Hell Out of People

2009-10-21T12:10:00.002-05:00

We are often told when we are young to work hard and be persistent. Chase those dreams, never give up. Keep trying. In everything from school work to athletics, to job hunting, we are told keep trying. But how much persistence is too much?

I remember how annoying a whining child can be. Sometimes we give in just to shut them up. I even remember how annoying spouses can be. I really don't miss that. My dogs sit up and beg for what ever they want at the moment. They will sit there in front of me, just staring at me until I notice them. Then, of course, I have to get up and do something for them. Once again they get what they want.

Let's not forget the telemarketers, sales people or bill collectors either. Just how many times do I have to tell those cemetery plot sellers that I will only be there three days, don't bother me again. Even if I tell them I want to be cremated they want to sell me a plot to bury my ashes. Have you ever gone to the mall only to be accosted by some sweet young woman who wants to spray the latest perfume on you? No thank you, let go of my arm! I almost slugged one gal for following me. Talk about persistent!
There is a bill collector who calls everyday to my cell phone number. I wonder who had that number before me. They keep leaving a voice-mail telling me to call a number.I wonder if I can block them from calling my "SmartPhone". Then again maybe the phone just isn't that smart...

But the high point of annoying persistence happened this morning. Poor Annie has been beset with a bad case of allergies. She can't sleep and sneezes a lot. She was really tired this morning so she went back to bed. In the meantime, a friend of hers called, and called, and called. You'd think she would get the message that Annie is not going to answer the phone. No she kept calling, first the house phone, then Annie's cell phone. I lost count after the tenth time.

What was the reason the woman persisted in calling? She had driven by the grammar school and saw an ambulance there. She assumed that it was there for one of Annie's children. Why would she automatically assume that? So she tried to call Annie over and over. Thinking the worst the friend would not give up. When she could not get Annie to answer the phone, she then called Jason's office only to find out that he was not there. He was out on business. But the woman assumed that there must be something wrong. Yeah, there was! She was annoying me! How could Annie get any rest with the phone ringing so often? I have always thought that if no-one answered, leave a message. If she had called me that many times, she might not have liked what I would have said.

To get ahead in this world we do have to try hard to achieve out goals and never give up.It's a good mindset to have. Never back down, keep fighting for what you want. On the other hand, we can persist to the point of annoying the Hell out of everybody. Who's up next and what the Hell do you want now?

Good Advise

2009-10-20T23:25:00.001-05:00

This was written by 90 year old Regina Brett of the Plain Dealer, Cleveland, Ohio.

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone. It's more healing than crying alone.
8 It's OK to get angry with God.. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind.
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
25. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?".
26. Always choose life.
27. Forgive everyone everything.
28. What other people think of you is none of your business.
29.. Time heals almost everything.. Give time, time.
30. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
31. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
32. Believe in miracles.
33.. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
34. Don't audit life Show up and make the most of it now.
35. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
36. Your children get only one childhood.
37. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
38. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
39. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back..
40. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
41. The best is yet to come
42. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
43. Yield
44. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.
45. Friends are the family that we choose for ourselves

Don't think This Top 10 came From Letterman

2009-10-19T18:06:00.001-05:00

Top 10 Reasons God Created Eve

10. God worried that Adam would always be lost in the garden because men hate to ask for directions.

9. God knew that Adam would one day need someone to hand him the TV remote.

8. God knew that Adam would never buy a new fig leaf when his seat wore out and would therefore need Eve to get one for him.

7. God knew that Adam would never make a doctor's appointment for himself.

6. God knew that Adam would never remember which night was garbage night.5. God knew that if the world was to be populated, men would never be able to handle childbearing.

4. As "Keeper of the Garden," Adam would never remember where he put his tools.

3. The scripture account of creation indicates Adam needed someone to blame his troubles on when God caught him hiding in the garden.

2. As the Bible says, "It is not good for man to be alone!"

1. When God finished the creation of Adam, He stepped back, scratched His head and said, "I can do better than that."

Slow News Day? Females in the News

2009-10-14T10:09:00.005-05:00

First Lady Michelle Obama is now an "action figure" doll. Would you buy it? She is wearing her signature sleeveless dress.Even the doll's arms look good. Of course there is no word on what "action" the doll does. Nor is there any comment from the White House about the doll.

Maria Shriver is in hot water with her husband Gov. Arnold Schwarzenegger of California. She's been caught using her cell phone while driving. Yes, some photographer caught her and now the pictures are all over. Gov.Schwarzenegger vows to "take swift action". Will the First Lady of California have her driver's license suspended by the governor?

Secretary of State Hillary Clinton says she is at "peace" with herself and has no plans to run for President or even governor of any state. Really? So if the current President does not get re-elected what will she do? Somehow I don't see her as the happy homemaker type.

Miley Cyrus has quit Twitter. Oh how the world will just have to do without her tweets. Daddy,"One hit wonder" Billy Ray Cyrus wants her to get back on the bird and continue tweeting. Her boy friend doesn't. Now what was that song...? Oh yeah -"Achy, Breaky Heart". Get a life Billy.

But the most interesting (sort of) news of the day is the story from Akron,Ohio. Chetania Davis,22, pleaded guilty to misdemeanor assault. Apparently Ms Davis attacked her 52 year old co-worker in the face with a stilleto heel. It was the co-worker's first day on the job. The attack occurred in the co-workers' dressing room. They both work at a club as exotic dancers. The younger dancer said she did not think the club needed any more dancers. The judge on the case sentenced Ms. Davis to one year probation and suspended a six month jail term. Ms. Davis accepted the plea because she wanted to move on with her life. Hopefully she was wearing a different pair of shoes when she said that to reporters.

I Used to Do It but Now I Don't Remember

2009-10-13T12:33:00.002-05:00

Uh, now how do I do this again? Have you ever thought about something you hadn't done in a long time? When you thought of that did it occur to you that you might not remember how to do it? Do you ever really forget things, or wish you could?

The other day my son in law said something about fixing a favorite meal. We all have meals that we have as our "specialty" to cook. Some people grill steaks very well. Others make great chili or soup. In the South there are people who make really good Southern fried chicken. Here in Texas there are people who take great pride in their Mexican style food.

As I thought about this I wondered. Let me see...it's been seven months since I have actually cooked any thing. I thought about different things I used to fix for supper. Then the thought struck me - how do I make that? I don't remember. I used to do this all the time. Now, uh what do I do? Most of the things I have cooked were not "recipes" from a book. They were just things observed or tried.

Then my mind wandered. What/who else is out there that I don't remember? I haven't driven in a while. I'm going to have to take the whole driving test over to get a new license. Hum, will I be able to answer the questions, or drive on the correct side of the road?

I remember a game that was popular in the seventies that my first husband taught me to play. Too bad I can't remember the name of the game. But after I learned how to play, I used to regularly beat my husband. Of course he would immediately go into a snit and complain that I made stupid moves. When he got mad and quit playing I had to remind him that the stupid moves were the ones he taught me. But if I tried to play it today I would not know how.

I have relatives that I would not know if I bumped into them. Of course there are people I could have met yesterday and I still would not know their name.There are old friends I wish I could remember. Then there are old boyfriends/husbands I wish I could forget. Did you know that Elvis sang a song called "I forgot to remember to forget"? The song was about trying to forget about a lost love.

There is an old saying - "Use it or lose it". Is that really true? If we don't do something routinely, do we forget how? Hum, well, I haven't had (close your eyes children) the "Big S" in a while. When the time comes (if ever) will I remember how? Would it be fun re-learning?

What else don't we do any more? Who writes letters? Letters? It's easier to Twitter or IM. Get or read directions? Who reads a street map? It's easier to buy a GPS system for the car than ask someone which way to a street. Yeah, just remember that GPS (also known as Bitch in a Box) might show your street as a vacant field or to turn left in one half mile after you have already turned into your driveway. Remember the Lexus that can parallel park itself? I want to take the driving test in that Lexus.

I know there have to be other things that I used to do. Can I do them now? I don't know, I can't remember what they were. So how can I remember if I used to do them? Well I guess I didn't use/do them enough, so I've lost them. Where am I? Did I forget to eat again?

Church Bulletin Bloopers

2009-10-10T10:30:00.003-05:00

Mrs. Johnson will be entering the hospital this week for testes.

Due to the rector's illness, Wednesday's healing services will be discontinued until further notice.

On a church bulletin during the minister's illness: God Is Good--Dr. Hargreaves is better.

This Sunday morning following services we will have our monthly feelowship.

Said during a congregational prayer when leading prayer for unsaved loved ones: “Father, we just want to pray for our unloved saved ones.”

Lift up our Messianic brothers and sisters in Israel who are suffering during our prayer time.

“I am the resurrection and the life. Whoever believes in me, even though he diets, yet shall be live.”

On a church postcard: “I have received Jesus Christ as my Lord and Savior. I would like a personal call.”

Church sign: “Jesus Saves!” Safeway sign across the street: “Safeway saves you more!”

Bare With Me Before I Throw a Fit

2009-10-08T19:56:00.002-05:00

I got a wild hair up my backside to change my template. I picked out one I liked and finally with Annie's help got it up. Of course nothing in my life seems to be easy. After I got it up and started to customize it I discovered that I had forgotten to write some of my lists down. So forgive me if I get cranky. I am trying to remember what I need to put on here and where it will go.

Right now I have a headache. My grandson and I were going to take Daisy for a walk. Then he decided that he would rather throw leaves at me then walk the dog. Then he got in trouble by telling me that I'm not "the boss". So we didn't go for a walk and he cried all the way home.

And that's not all. It seems that Daisy has taken a liking to sticking her head into the cat's box and getting the little droppings out and eating them. I sure hope they are tasty! I've spanked her several times, to no avail. She didn't do this at Traci's house and that box doesn't have a top. Go figure.

As of right now, I'm getting frustrated because I have so much to do on this. I do like the picture because we have some lakes in Texas that look a lot like it. For I quit, for now. I didn't realize how much extra work I would have to do here. Hopefully I will get it set up better soon. Otherwise I am going to be in a bit of a bad mood.

Right now I am going to get something to eat and a glass (maybe two) of wine. I hope tomorrow will be a better day.

Top 10 Mom Scolding in the Bible

2009-10-02T15:09:00.000-05:00

10. Sampson, get your hands off of that lion, you don't know where it's been!

9. David, I told you not to play in the house with that string! Go practice your harp. We pay good money for those lessons.

8. Abraham! Stop wandering around the countryside and get home for supper!

7. Shadrach, Meschach and Abendeco! I told you, never play with fire!

6. Cain! Get off your brother! You're going to kill him some day!

5. Noah, no you can' t help them. Don't bring home any strays.

4. Gideon! Have you been hiding in that wine press again? Look at my clothes.

3. James and John! No more burping at the dinner table, please. People are going to call you sons of thunder.

2. Judas! Have you been in my purse again?

1. Jesus! Close the door! You think you were born in a barn.

What's That Smell?

2009-09-28T15:39:00.002-05:00

Something smells in the neighborhood. What a wonderful fragrance to start the day. I had not even had my coffee. The smell is giving Annie a headache. She says it smells outside. Intrepid adventurer that I am, I decided to check things out.

I had seen Annie's labs, Bailey and Landry, watching something intently in the shed/chicken coop. There are no chickens here. The dogs like to hang out there in rainy or cold weather. They kept looking around, but refused to go near.They did voice their opinions loudly. What do they see? Nothing seemed amiss as I walked toward the shed. Then I saw something move. No, not a snake or a buzzard which I had seen a few days ago. In the back corner, behind the bicycles was a skunk.

First thing we had to get the dogs out of the way. I'm surprised they hadn't already attempted to battle the real life "Pepe la Pew". But they had apparently kept their distance. Annie herded the labs into the house. Then we looked for a number for some kind of animal control. It's not an easy number to find in the local phone book. Annie ended up calling a number in Ft. Stockton to find out some information. Thankfully since Ft. Stockton is about 1 1/2 hrs away, they were able to give her some numbers of local "animal" people. Most of her calls went straight to voice-mail. She did finally get hold of a guy who happened to be near. He was working on something in a pasture and said he could be here shortly.

So I spent the time waiting for him babysitting a skunk. First it moved around in the shed. Then it got out and wandered around, but could not figure out how to escape. Well, actually he did escape through the fence but when he saw the big dogs across the alley he decided I was better than them. Back into the shed he went. Then he got brave and tried to run to freedom along the side of the fence. Not the brightest animal in the world, I thought.

As he ran around the back of the yard, I wondered what he thought. Apparently not much I guess. As I followed him around the back yard he ultimately trapped himself. He made a mistake of crawling into a length of pvc pipe. As I stood watching the pipe, the animal control guy came in. He was the "substitute". The official animal control person is also the local bailiff and was in court. She had all the traps. Naturally. So the other guy and I decided to leave the skunk in the pipe which was 8-10 feet long. He blocked the ends with cinder blocks which Annie got a couple of garbage bags and some duct tape.

I had to wonder how safe all of this was. The plastic bags were thin and tore easily.But he managed to seal the ends of the pipe and took the unwanted guest, pipe and all away in the truck. He said he'd release it out on some farmland a couple of miles down the road. I hope the farmer doesn't mind. Then he asked if Annie wanted the pipe back. A resounding "NO!" was the answer.

Such is life in the hamlet of Ozona. I thought buzzards were looking at me for a meal the other day. Grasshoppers bounce all over the place. The one thing I have yet to see are the turkeys that walk around town unmolested. Apparently they are a common sight. Wonder what I'll find next?

The Re-birth of Me

2009-09-25T10:04:00.004-05:00

The last few months have been a roller coaster ride for me. Up and down, over and under, my feelings and thoughts have been on a wild ride. At times it has been easy to feel defeated. Then there have been moments of peace. Those moments which were few have now moved in with me. I think they are here to stay.

Call me crazy. I don't care. A few weeks ago, before I decided to visit Annie, I was sitting in my bedroom in Waco thinking.Too much time on my hands? Some would probably say yes. Me, I was struck by a thought. How I came to this thought I can't really say. This thought, oddly enough, left me with a good feeling. To explain or describe this feeling is difficult at best. It's as if someone spoke to me and said, "You'll be ok, I have a plan for you."

This feeling was spooky to the skeptic in me. The more I thought about it the more I questioned myself. Yet this feeling would not, and has not changed. I know, somehow, there is something out there waiting for just the right time for me. Is it my fertile mind dreaming or it this some sort of an epiphany? I don't know. I can't shake this feeling. I can't explain how or why I have this. How do I explain this to anyone? How do I not sound nutty.?

I've heard that God sometimes speaks to a person's heart. I've never really believed it before now. Trying to explain this hasn't be easy. So Annie suggested I talk with Chris, the Pastor of their church. Well... I'm not sure about that. What good would that do? I'm like, eh? Well, ok. It couldn't hurt, right?

Yesterday I had a meeting with Chris who is a very nice, very young, and very tall man. He and his wife are a nice couple and have two adorable little boys. His wife teaches the women's study group. I've gone a couple of times with Annie and Jason to church. He brings out good thoughts in his sermons. So I thought, what the heck. I'll give it a shot.

I told Chris about what had happened to me and my current, unshakable feeling. I asked him all sorts of questions. He was thoughtful and gave me some insight into things. We talked for over an hour. He listened and offered suggestions. Messages or feelings such as mine can be true. I must continue to listen. Yes, he told me I will be all right. I am in the right place and with continued study and faith, the plan will happen. I must be ready. When will the plan come to fruition? That question will be answered when the time comes. Not my time - His time.

I'm ready. Sling all the arrows you want, throw all the rocks you have. I won't be defeated. I only need patience. My time will come. I have the Power with me.

Zen Sarcasm

2009-09-23T08:53:00.000-05:00

1. Do not walk behind me, for I may not lead. Do not walk ahead of me, for I may not follow. Do not walk beside me either. Just pretty much leave me alone.

2 The journey of a thousand miles begins with a broken fan belt or a leaky tire.

3. It's always darkest before dawn, so if you're going to steal your neighbor's newspaper, that's the time to do it.

4. Don't be irreplaceable. If you can't be replaced, you can't be promoted.

5. Always remember that you're unique. Just like everyone else.

6. Never test the depth of the water with both feet.

7. If you think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments.

8. Before you criticize someone, you should walk a mile in their shoes. That way, when you criticize them, you're a mile away and you have their shoes.

9. If at first you don't succeed...Skydiving is not for you.

10. Give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. Teach him how to fish, and he will sit in a boat and drink beer all day.

Fall Has Fell - Maybe

2009-09-22T10:18:00.003-05:00

We all woke up this morning to a cool breeze. Obviously the cool front has now arrived. It should be nice around here for a few days. Then toward the end of the week it will be back up to the warmer temperatures again. Gotta love it. This kind of weather keeps you guessing about what to wear each day.

This weather also made Annie and me think of stew. So we put some stew meat in the crock pot. Hopefully we'll make enough to put some in the freezer later. Throwing stuff into the crock pot is not hard. Now yesterday was a time consuming candy time. Annie made peanut butter cups. That takes a little time to make the peanut butter balls and melt the chocolate. Pouring it over the balls can be a little interesting too. But we did it.

Now that Fall is officially here, it's time to say good bye to Astros manager Cecil Cooper and good bye to the Astros chances to get into the playoffs again. I'm surprised that Cooper lasted as long as he did. There many people who wanted him fired earlier in the season. All things considered,
I feel a little like singing "They're breaking up that old gang of mine..." Next year could see a different Astros team.

Now we can move on to the real sport of fall, football. I was not happy with the Texans first game which they lost. I was a little worried during the second, but they came through in a street fighting style. That will teach the Titans to start a brawl with us. I hope we'll continue to improve. My college teams are doing well. Texas is #2 and Alabama is #3. I find these high rankings a little worrisome since it is still early in the season. One loss could ruin chances for a national championship. We shall see.

I'm looking forward to this fall. Who knows? Maybe this will be a good season for me. Seasons of life change just like the seasons of the weather. I haven't seen much in the way of color yet. The leaves haven't changed yet. But I know that with each season there is a new beginning and new challenges. I'm ready. Of course I have no intention of raking leaves.

How Do You Get To Heaven?

2009-09-17T08:59:00.002-05:00

"If I sold my house and my car, had a big garage sale, and gave all my money to the church, would that get me into heaven?" The teacher asked the children in his Sunday school class.

"NO!" the children all answered.

"If I cleaned the church every day, mowed the yard, and kept everything neat and tidy, would that get me into heaven?"

Again the answer was, "NO!""Well, then, if I was kind to animals and gave candy to all the children and loved my wife, would that get me into heaven?" I asked them again.

Once more they all answered, "NO!"

"Well," I continued, thinking they were a good bit more theologically sophisticated than I had given them credit for, "then how can I get into heaven?"

A five-year-old boy shouted out, "You gotta be dead!"

Well That's One Way To Open A Can

2009-09-15T12:20:00.003-05:00

Right now I am smelling the aroma of pot roast as it cooks in the slow cooker.Ummm. I love roast done in a crock pot with veggies. We're gonna eat good tonight.

But there was a small crisis this morning as Annie was putting the ingredients into the pot. Obviously the roast and veggies were easy. Then she got the cream of mushroom soup ready. One can went in easy. Sure you say. How hard can it be to open a soup can? In this case, it was maddeningly difficult.

I'm in the bedroom when I hear Annie call me to the kitchen. Apparently one of the soup cans had an idea that it would not give up it's contents without a fight. When she pulled the tab,instead of opening the can, the ring came off. Guess that can is just wasted. That's what Annie thought. Oh ye of little faith - Mom is here!

Have you ever battled a can? I mean really battled? I asked Annie where the electric can opener was. She pointed to it, but said it didn't do very well. True, as I discovered. Ok. Where is the church key opener? That didn't work either. Let's try a knife - no luck. I did manage to get a small opening but since the soup was thick, it was all but useless. Now, I'm ticked off. No can of soup is going to get the best of me! "Do you have pliers or a screwdriver?" So we get both from the tool chest. I manage to get the hole a little bigger, but not enough. Now I am really irritated. I hate to waste things. So I got the hammer from the tool chest. How could one little can cause so much trouble. The war was on! Ever take a hammer to a soup can? It's not pretty. But a mom on a mission is dangerous! Mountain get out of my way! Ha! after a few less than delicate pounds with the hammer, the can gave up it's contents.

That should teach any can of mushroom soup not to do battle with me! Of course it wasn't pretty. But what war is? I will not be denied. Yeah, it probably would have been easier just to throw the can in the trash. On the other hand I am stubborn when it comes to some things. Just ask any member of my family. Obviously I would not recommend opening a can of mushroom soup this way. It can be messy. Yes, it was an odd way to open the can, but it worked. Now when do we eat?

He Was Going to Get the Family Dog

2009-09-10T20:05:00.003-05:00

Eight years ago Christopher C. Newton got on American Airlines Flight 77 to California. He and his family had moved to Ashburn, Virginia so he would not have to travel so much. He was head of Work/Life Benefits which was founded in 1982 to provide work, life training to corporations for their employees. He was educated at California Polytech University and the Anderson School at UCLA. His wife Amy, son Michael and daughter Sarah were happy that he would not have to travel so much.

Christopher Newton was a very private person who loved his family and a good game of golf. He took American Airlines Flight 77 on September 11, 2001 so that he could go back to California to get the family dog. He never made it there. Flight 77 crashed into the Pentagon that fatal morning.

We all, as Americans, remember that day. Many of us watched our televisions as the horror of the attack on our country began. We watched helplessly as the Twin Towers fell. We watched as the Pentagon was breached. We learned of the heroism of passengers who fought off the hijackers and probably saved more lives by crashing the plane in that empty field. We remember. The images are seared into our brains. Let us never forget those 2996 people who lost their lives that day. Let us always remember what this country has stood for and why we must honor these brave people who lost their lives on 9/11/01.

Joint Custody? Of Me?

2009-09-09T08:15:00.003-05:00

Annie has wanted me to come visit her at her home for a while now. Since I don't have a car I've had to wait until she had time to come get me. She decided that she would take me when she came back Sunday after the birthday week-end in Houston. From what I understand, blackmail could be an issue after what I heard and saw about the party. Ahem, we shall just leave it at that.

An interesting thought crossed my mind due to something Annie said to Traci. Granted it was a little odd but, this is my family. Most of the time we think of joint custody as between divorced parents with kids. Mom usually has the kids most of the time and dad has them for a time.We've all known someone in that situation. For some reason I found it funny when Annie spoke to Traci about me going home with Annie. I guess it now can be said that Traci and Annie share "joint custody" of me. Huh? Well, it could be thought of in that way. I'll be here with Annie for a few weeks. Then I'll go back to Traci's...

Oh yeah, apparently someone even mentioned "joint custody" to my son Pat. Alas, he has no room for his dear, darling, demented mother. That's ok Patrick. I know what is important to you. Snicker...

Joint custody of me - what a concept. Then again, this could get interesting. Bobby said he would miss me. Guess he'll miss talking to me. And oh dear, Aryn cried and cried when we left. Brad and Aryn didn't want the dogs to go. Sigh. Wonder what Skylar and Michael will do when I go back to Waco. I am reminded of when the kids were growing up. Maybe I should start plotting to get Annie and Traci against each other?? Shades of when they were in their father's custody. Be still my evil heart. Payback? Who me?

With Apologies to Secretary Clinton

2009-09-05T09:34:00.002-05:00

Bill Clinton, Hillary Clinton, and Al Gore were in an airplane that crashed. In heaven, they found God sitting on the great, white throne.

He addressed Al first. "Al, what do you believe in?"

Al replied, "Well, I believe I won the election in 2000, but it was your will that I did not serve. I've come to understand that now."

God thought for a second and said, "Very good. Come and sit at my left."

God then addressed Bill. "Bill, what do you believe in?"

Bill replied, "I believe in forgiveness. I've sinned, but I've never held a grudge against my fellow man, and I hope no grudges are held against me."

Again, God thought for a second and then said, "You are forgiven, my son. Come and sit at my right."

God then turned to Hillary and asked, "Hillary, what do you believe in?"

She replied, "I believe you're sitting in my chair."

Shut In, Shut Out, Forgotten

2009-09-03T12:31:00.003-05:00

How many people do you speak to on a daily basis? Sure you speak to your family, friends and co-workers. You probably speak to your neighbors on either side of your house. You wave to them as you leave or come home from work. But what about that old lady down the street? Do you know anything about her? Have you noticed that she rarely gets out? Does she even have a way to get out?

We are so caught up in our daily lives that we may not even think of the people we don't see often. They may not live near you, but they are there. One day you could be one of them. These are the people who for any number of reasons could be called shut ins or maybe even forgotten. Maybe through no fault of their own, they are single, widowed, or divorced and have no-one to turn to in a time of need. Maybe they are poor and hungry. Maybe the only contact with the outside world for them is the people from Meals on Wheels who bring them food. Just imagine that the only human contact you have is a person bringing you a meal. On the other hand, maybe they don't need the Meals on Wheels program. Maybe they have a neighbor or relative who occasionally stops by to take them to buy groceries or just to walk the mall. Imagine how good that must feel, just to get away from the confines of those four walls, even if only for an hour or two.

There are a lot of people who are alone. They are not all old or shut in. Some feel shut out because it seems that nobody cares. No one seems to want to take the time to stop by and say "Hello". How much would it cost to stop by and ask, "Do you need anything? Can I take you somewhere?" or even just "How are you today?".

Some day we will all be alone. Some of us will have family that we can depend on for help, love and security. Some of us will not have that luxury. Some will not know where to go or who to call. Yes, there are outreach programs thanks to some religious or state and local governments. Still, some people will either not know how to reach for help or will be too proud to ask for help.

Remember when you know someone who is alone, or see someone who is alone, that could be you. Give them a smile, or a helping hand now and then. Talk to them. Don't let them be shut in, shut out, or forgotten.

Odds & Ends, In and Out

2009-09-02T10:04:00.003-05:00

It is hard to believe I've been here almost 6 months.

Happy 14th birthday to my granddaughter Cheyanne.

I guess we Astros fans will have to be content to wait 'til next year, again. Have you seen Roy Oswalt's website? He's also on Twitter. Yes, really. I would like to commend another Astro, Aaron Boone. He has been activated and is ready to play, barely 5 months after having open heart surgery. All I can say is- Amazing!

Did you know that there is a Twitter soap opera? It's called "Chicago to Coronado". I guess it had to happen. It even has a black lab as one of the characters.

This week-end should be interesting for some of the family. Traci, Cheyanne, Brad, and Annie are going to Houston for a birthday bash. Annie and Pat, Cheyanne, Amanda and Aryn have birthdays close to each other. Of course Aryn is grounded, yet again, and won't be able to go. That is unless she gets ungrounded. That remains to be seen.

So this week-end it probably will be Bobby, Aryn, and me here by ourselves. I was looking forward to some peace and quiet, but with the "Drama Queen" under house arrest I don't know how much "quiet" we will have.

I've been waiting for some inspiration but I guess it got lost. So, what should I do first? Sneak attack the dogs for a bath, or go play on Facebook? Hum. Hey Daisy...

Woman vs Phone

2009-08-28T13:11:00.008-05:00

Isn't technology grand? First we had rotary phone service, then touch tone. Then came the cordless phones. But things really went wild when the cell phone became the gold standard. I remember when they first came out. They were expensive, big and boxy. Now they fit into the palm of your hand and can do almost anything except cook supper.Maybe one day we will all be able to dial a number to do that, too.

I've recently had to change phones. I had an old flip phone from Sanyo that I have had for years. I first got a cell phone when I went to Phoenix to be with my daughter Annie when she was about to have Skylar who is now seven. It was plain but useful. It took pictures and I could read e-mails, and text. I rarely used these features though. Why do you text on a phone anyway? For me it takes longer to find the right keys to text than it does to talk to a warm body on the other end of the phone.

Now I have a Smart Phone. Annie and Jason decided to let me use Jason's phone since he really doesn't use it. This is going to take some time for me to get used to this phone. It took me a while just to figure out how to answer it. So this is the way it is going to be, huh? Smart Woman vs Smart Phone? Smart Woman? Ok, you can stop laughing now. I haven't really paid attention to the changes in phones over the last few years so give me a break.

So now I have a phone which came with three manuals. One, the "Getting Started Guide", one the "Welcome to Sprint" and one called "Experience Sprint Power Vision". The last two manuals are still in their sealed wrappers having never been opened.This is in addition to a Desktop Software HotSync Manager User Guide. Huh? What? And let us not forget the Sync cord and some other tiny cord whose use I have forgotten. I did figure out how to plug the power cord into the wall so I can charge the phone.

Then I look at the top of the box with it's picture of the phone. The caption on the box says - "Make today extraordinary with this magical device. Instantly beam email, pictures...right to the palm of your hand...That's life at Sprint Speed." Sure it is. I finally sent a text out this morning. I forgot the keyboard is qwerty so I spent time trying to find the letters. I was still used to my old phone. I still say it is so much easier just to say "Hello".

So let's see, what shall I do now? Camera, camcorder, documents, downloads, emails, maps, messaging, video, even life tv are all at my fingertips. I can see downloading ring tones maybe or maps. I guess it would be a good idea to be able to create and send a document. I really don't know about watching video or tv on a cell phone like this. Just imagine watching tv and the actor's nose fills the entire screen. And to think that we went to the moon with much less technology.

Maybe one day I might actually figure this whole phone out. Everyone else seems to have no trouble doing all sorts of stuff with their phones.I still don't get why people sit in the same room, even on the same sofa, and text each other but that's another story. Well it does give me something to play with during the day. Yes ,sir there will come a day when I will be able to say that in the battle of the Smart Woman vs the Smart Phone, the Smart Woman won. Wait a minute the phone is ringing, now what do I do? Hey, I thought I told you to stop laughing!

From Bibles to Boats??

2009-08-27T09:34:00.000-05:00

A young man from Nebraska moves to Florida and goes to a big "everything under one roof" department store looking for a job. The manager asks, "Do you have any sales experience?" The kid replies, "Yeah, I was one of the best Bible salesman back in Omaha."

The boss liked the kid and gave him the job. "You can start tomorrow. I'll come down after we close and see how you did."

His first day on the job was rough, but he got through it. After the store was locked up, the boss came down. "How many customers bought something from you today?” The kid responds, "One."

The boss says, "Just one? Our sales people average 20 to 30 customers a day. How much was the sale for?"

"$101,237.65."

"$101,237.65? Holy Mother Mary! What did you sell to him?"

"First, I sold him a small fish hook. Then, I sold him a medium fish hook. Then, I sold him a larger fish hook. Then, I sold him a new fishing rod. Then, I asked him where he was going fishing and he said down the coast. I told him he was going to need a boat, so we went down to the boat department, and I sold him a twin engine Boston Whaler. Then, he said he didn't think his car would pull it, so I took him down to the automobile department and sold him a 4x4 truck with all the bells and whistles."

"A guy came in here to buy a fish hook, and you sold him a boat and a truck?!"

"No, the guy came in here to buy feminine products for his wife, and I said, 'Dude, your weekend's shot. You should go fishing.'"

Blessing a Body...?

2009-08-22T09:16:00.001-05:00

A newly ordained deacon was asked to hold a graveside service for someone with no family or friends. It was his first official assignment, so he eagerly agreed.

Taking his duties very seriously, the deacon let early the next morning for the cemetery. However, he made several wrong turns and quickly got himself lost. When he finally arrived more than an hour late, the hearse was nowhere to be seen and the two workmen were eating lunch.

The deacon got out of his car, quickly threw on his vestments, and hurried to the open grave. Looking into the pit, he saw that the vault lid was already in place. With a sign, he took out his prayer book and read the burial service.

After he had left, one of the workmen said to the other, “Maybe we should have told him he just blessed a septic tank.”

Bench Warmer, or First String?

2009-08-18T14:44:00.003-05:00

Sometimes life is like a game. Players are benched or traded for various reasons. The Astros just traded Ivan Rodriguez to the Rangers. He can now say, "gee this place looks familiar" when he arrives at the park. I see that Bret Favre has decided to un-retire again. Will he ever learn? Too bad, now the Texans won't get the game they wanted which would have had quarterback Matt Schaub against former backup Sage Rosenfels. Rosenfels was hoping to be the first string QB with the Vikings. He and Tarvaris Jackson were competing for the top spot. Now they will have to sit and wait for Favre to be benched or injured.

I have a great deal of empathy for those wonderful bench warmers who just sit and wait for their chance. Sometimes they get it, other times they get traded and still wait. Whether it be a young,eager player waiting to show what he can do, or a wily,old veteran hoping for one last chance for glory, they sit. They dream of what could be or what could have been.

Brian McTaggart, the Houston Astros blogger said he just talked to "Pudge". Rodriguez is sad to leave the Astros but is excited to go to the Rangers who have a chance to get into the playoffs.

Too bad that in the game of life we don't always get the chance to play or even just be able to be a bench warmer. Maybe we need to talk to our agents and tell them we're not happy on the bench. We've still got some pop in our bat. Surely we could be of use to some team? Where's the manager? Where's that high paid agent? What's that? The telephone? I'm a free agent? No? I've been traded? Well...Put me in coach, I'm ready to play. All I need is the bat and the glove...We're only 10.5 games out of first place? Oh...well, let's get out there and play some ball. This is the game of life, right?

Gunfight at the OK Corral, Sort of...

2009-08-13T13:00:00.002-05:00

Yesterday was one of those days you would rather forget. As I told a friend last night, "gonna be a two glasses of wine night". It is a bit quieter today. Of course the reason why is that Aryn is now grounded and has to do chores as punishment. How does one little girl get into so much trouble? And yet she continues to argue...Boy her mother was mad! And then when her dad came home so was he! At this rate she will be grounded until she is 21.

But the real fight started while Brad was at the desk playing on the computer. Daisy and Sammie were both at his feet. For some unknown reason Lady had chosen not to join the other two there. But Spots, the cat, decided to stir up trouble. And when I say trouble, that is with a T. Somehow he managed to do some smack talking to the dogs. Then the next thing I hear is growling and yelping. This went on for a while before Traci and I could get the situation under control. Of course the cat who instigated the whole thing walks away completely unscathed. We get the dogs separated. I grab Sammie and pull her to the back door. Out the door she went.I though briefly about laying a smack-down on her. But it wouldn't have meant anything to her. Then I had to get Daisy calmed down and checked for injuries. Daisy was one shook up dog, but apparently none the worse for wear. So where did the cat go? He jumped onto one of the dining chairs and just looked at us all with "What's your problem?" look. Daisy stayed very close to me for the rest of the day and night. I still can't believe that Lady chose not to get into the fray.

Yes, it was a nerve-wracking day. A good excuse to have an extra glass of wine. At least the Astros won last night. It's hard to believe there are only about 50 games left in the season. One good thing did happen, I got the box of mail, finally along with another phone which I am now trying to learn to use. So now I can scratch the mail off my list. So now it's time to holster the guns or at least retract the cat's claws and let the sleeping dogs lie.

Happy Days are Here Again, Almost

2009-08-12T13:41:00.002-05:00

The days dwindle down to a precious few... In less that two weeks school starts here. Summer vacation is almost over. I used to know a morning DJ years ago who would play the song" Happy Days are Here Again" on the first day of school just for the parents. On the last day of school, he played it for the kids. School shopping has been done for the most part.That is a nightmare I would not wish on anyone. Some of us "adult types" are eagerly awaiting August 24th. Peace and quiet will be savored, at least for a few hours a day.

Cheyanne is happy and ready to get back to school. She's a good student and is ready for new challenges in the 8th grade. Brad is not saying much about 3rd grade. Aryn does not want to go to 1st grade. She says so often!

These last few days have been, shall we say, a bit trying. For some reason the last days of summer vacation find the children irritable and annoying. At least it seems so for the younger two. Aryn has complained bitterly that she is bored. Diva that she is, nothing suits her. She complains loudly. When Mom reaches the boiling point "Aryn, go to your room" is heard several times a day. "Brad, stop screeching" is another common statement. Some days I have to remember to "duck and cover" due to the hostilities between children and parents.

Soon chaos will again be the order of the morning. Crabby kids who refused to go to sleep when told, will race through the house to get breakfast, school stuff , and hair fixed. Then they will trot out to the driveway and wait, listening for the wonderful sound of the school bus as it approaches the house. These kids do not know how lucky they are to have curb to curb service. Then for the better part of the day, the house will be relatively quiet. That is until the bus brings them back in the afternoon. Then Mom will be bombarded with papers to sign, homework to supervise and anything else that finds its way home with the kids.

And let us not forget that in just a few days they will be getting back in training. Aryn will, of course, not be happy because she will be the first to take a bath and go to bed. "Why do I have to go first?" will be her question. "You are the youngest, now go!" will be the answer. About a half hour later Brad will have to follow the same ritual. He will have to realize that he can no longer stay up all night and sleep away half the day. Cheyanne as the oldest will be the last to have to go to bed. I think she is the most ready to get all of this going.

Soon another summer will be gone. Sometimes it is hard to believe how fast it goes. The kids will all be in school, football games will be played, some won, some lost. Then time will continue to move on through August, September, November and so on. School days seem to go faster with each year.

But for those of us who will be kid-less for several hours of the day soon, the silence will be golden. "Happy Days are Here Again..."

From a Friend

2009-08-09T19:37:00.000-05:00

Inner Peace

If you can start the day without caffeine,

If you can always be cheerful, ignoring aches and pains,

If you can resist complaining and boring people with your troubles,

If you can eat the same food every day and be grateful for it,

If you can understand when your loved ones are too busy to give you anytime,

If you can take criticism and blame without resentment ,

If you can conquer tension without medical help,

If you can relax without liquor,

If you can sleep without the aid of drugs,

...Then You Are Probably The Family Dog!

And you thought I was going to get all spiritual.

The Summer Wind

2009-08-03T15:12:00.003-05:00

I decided to take a break from playing Bejeweled on Facebook and go outside. I sat down on the concrete porch at the back of the house. The first thing I thought about was the news story I saw about snakes moving into downtown Austin. Seems the drought is making the creatures move. I know there could be some around here. Then I look at the newly mowed yard. Bobby mowed last night and also mowed down most of the garden which had all but died due to a lack of water and interest. That was also why I sneezed 14 times last night.

Sitting there by myself I noticed how quiet it was for a Monday afternoon. In the distance I could hear some constant sounds coming from the road by the airport. No planes were flying but cars and trucks were still driving by. No birds were flying around either. Maybe they were trying to keep cool in the shade of the trees. Flies still invaded my privacy. They fought for a place on my hands or my water glass as they buzzed around in search of something to eat. The only obvious sounds were those of the three wind chimes as they swayed in the hot, sultry wind. One wooden one clacked along almost in tune with my two metal ones. My "tacky" palm trees swayed to some unknown tune while my hummingbirds danced around as if they could hear music. Where's "Lola" when you need her? "At the Copa, Copacabana..."

Outside, I could not hear the children inside as they played video games or annoyed their parents with constant questions or problems. As I listened to the wind chimes and the wind wrestle with the tree leaves, I felt the warm, sultry blast of the summer breeze as it swirled around the house.Whenever the wind stopped, I could feel how stagnant the air was without that little breeze.

At that point I found myself thinking about what is next for me. I don't know what is in store for me in the future. The warm breeze of summer beckons me and leads me to wonder where I will be, who I am, and who I want to be. The song of the road, the chimes and the breeze seem to call to me. And yet I have not found an answer or lyrics to this song. And so I sit, contemplating my navel, waiting for that elusive sign to tell me. I'm listening to the summer wind, but it's not talking, at least to me, for now.

The Pious Man and the Atheist

2009-08-02T10:35:00.001-05:00

A very religious man lived right next door to an atheist. While the religious one prayed day in, day out, and was constantly on his knees in communion with his Lord, the atheist never even looked twice at a church.

However, the atheist's life was good, he had a well-paying job and a beautiful wife, and his children were healthy and good-natured, whereas the pious man's job was strenuous and his wages were low, his wife was getting fatter every day and his kids wouldn't give him the time of the day.So one day, deep in prayer as usual, the pious man raised his eyes towards heaven and asked: "Oh God, I honor you every day, I ask your advice for every problem and confess to you my every sin. Yet my neighbor, who doesn't even believe in you and certainly never prays, seems blessed with every happiness, while I go poor and suffer many an indignity. Why is this?"

And a great voice was heard from above...

"BECAUSE HE DOESN'T BOTHER ME ALL THE TIME!"

Me Worry About Asteroids? Nah, I've Got Twitter

2009-07-29T18:59:00.003-05:00

From Wired Science:
The Real Twitpocalypse:Asteroid Alerts Come to Twitter

Been looking for a reason to join Twitter, but haven’t been able to quite take the plunge?

Forget Shaq and William Gibson: Alerts about asteroids cruising near Earth have come to Twitter. @AsteroidWatch will let you know any time a space rock gets within a few lunar distances. Much more asteroid info will be distributed via a new NASA/JPL website. (Though if you want to know if a nuke is the best way to stop an asteroid, you’ll still need to come to Wired Science.)

“Most people have a fascination with near-Earth objects,” Don Yeomans, manager of NASA’s Near-Earth Object Program Office at the Jet Propulsion Laboratory, said in a press release. “And I have to agree with them. I have studied them for over three decades and I find them to be scientifically fascinating, and a few are potentially hazardous to Earth.”

The recent collision between a comet and Jupiter underscored the very real presence of possibly dangerous space objects in the solar system.

The Twitter feed, @lowflyingrocks, already uses NASA’s raw data to let you know after an asteroid has passed the Earth. But the site tells you about every rock within 0.2 astronomical units — that’s more than 18 million miles — so you get a ton of updates. @AsteroidWatch will be choosier about the near-earth objects it tells you about. Only rocks that come within a scant 750,000 miles or so of Earth will earn a Tweet.

With previous Twitter accounts, NASA employees have created voices for the various robots and machines that the agency operates. Some, like @MarsPhoenix, were cute and cuddly. Perhaps the proper voice for the near earth object warning system will be slightly more urgent and prone to profanity.

Any kind of personality would be an improvement on @lowflyingrock’s robotic language. Its last Tweet went a little something like this: “2007 LL, ~220m-490m in diameter, just passed the Earth at 6km/s, missing by ~twenty-seven million, five hundred thousand km.”

Now Don't You feel better? Twitter is on the job. It will let us know about those dastardly asteroids and save us all. Sure, I'll sleep better tonight. On the other hand maybe I will lay away all night waiting for that fateful tweet. Oh why bother. Wait a minute my Tweet Deck is calling. An asteroid coming? No, just the Astros losing 12-0 to the Cubs.